Limericks. (New)

Two young whippets running through the park
A bit of a worry, it was getting really dark

Two young whippets running through the park
A bit of a worry, it was getting really dark
But a whistle was heard, clear and shrill

Two young whippets running through the park
A bit of a worry, it was getting really dark
But a whistle was heard, clear and shrill
Brought them zooming up the hill

Two young whippets running through the park
A bit of a worry, it was getting really dark
But a whistle was heard, clear and shrill
Brought them zooming up the hill
The whippets were just having a lark.

A cat and two mice had a race

A cat and two mice had a race
But the old cat couldn’t keep up the pace

A cat and two mice had a race
But the old cat couldn’t keep up the pace
So he decided to cheat

A cat and two mice had a race
But the old cat couldn’t keep up the pace
So he decided to cheat
And put some skates on his feet

A cat and two mice had a race
But the old cat couldn’t keep up the pace
So he decided to cheat
And put some skates on his feet
And the mice soon gave up the chase.

As Fred sat in the cafe one day

As Fred sat in the cafe one day
Hoping a waitress would come his way

As Fred sat in the cafe one day
Hoping a waitress would come his way
He caught the girls eye

As Fred sat in the cafe one day
Hoping a waitress would come his way
He caught the girls eye
And ordered some chips and a pie

As Fred sat in the cafe one day
Hoping a waitress would come his way
He caught the girls eye
And ordered some chips and a pie
She said “No, come out the back and let’s play”.

Fred’s eyes lit up with glee

As Fred sat in the cafe one day
Hoping a waitress would come his way
He caught the girls eye
She responded “My, oh my”

Fred’s eyes lit up with glee
Then thought better of it and decided to flee

Sorry, I was too late with my submission and may have caused confusion!

It never takes much to confuse me these daze
days.

Freds eyes lit up with glee
Then thought better of it and decided to flee
But then later that day

Freds eyes lit up with glee
Then thought better of it and decided to flee
But then later that day
Fancied a romp in the hay

Freds eyes lit up with glee
Then thought better of it and decided to flee
But then later that day
Having lost his toupee

Freds eyes lit up with glee
Then thought better of it and decided to flee
But then later that day
Fancied a romp in the hay
With the farmer’s daughter Marie

But Marie told Fred to sod off

But Marie told Fred to sod off
As she fancied Cecil the toff