As Bert in his fantasy revelled
His appearance became quite dishevelled
But he summoned up some pluck
Even though he was awestruck
As Bert in his fantasy revelled
His appearance became quite dishevelled
But he summoned up some pluck
Even though he was awestruck
To ask that his kidneys be devilled.
She rose to the challenge, with pan to hand
She rose to the challenge, with pan to hand
Things werenāt going as he planned
She rose to the challenge, with pan to hand
Things werenāt going as he planned
The kidneys she burned
She rose to the challenge, with pan to hand
Things werenāt going as he planned
The kidneys she burned
A lesson was learned
She rose to the challenge, with pan to hand
Things werenāt going as he planned
The kidneys she burned
A lesson was learned
And the fire was put out with sand.
A very large man from Dover
A very large man from Dover
Happened across a four-leafed clover
A very large man from Dover
Happened across a four-leafed clover
He said āJust my luckā
A very large man from Dover
Happened across a four-leafed clover
He said āJust my luckā
āFor it to be covered in muckā
A very large man from Dover
Happened across a four-leafed clover
He said āJust my luckā
āFor it to be covered in muck -
Iāll send to my Ex Lover!ā
The cat food cupboard was empty
The cat food cupboard was empty
Although it wasnāt meant to be
The cat food cupboard was empty
Although it wasnāt meant to be
So to the pet shop I went
The cat food cupboard was empty
Although it wasnāt meant to be
So to the pet shop I went
Although Iād overspent
The cat food cupboard was empty
Although it wasnāt meant to be
So to the pet shop I went
Although Iād overspent
But to be honest the food was for me.
It wasnāt the first time Iād tried it
t wasnāt the first time Iād tried it
But in truth Iād felt quite a twit
It wasnāt the first time Iād tried it
But in truth Iād felt quite a twit
The first time was fish
It wasnāt the first time Iād tried it
But in truth Iād felt quite a twit
The first time was fish
which was actually delish
It wasnāt the first time Iād tried it
But in truth Iād felt quite a twit
The first time was fish
which was actually delish
But the liver - out I did spit.
I must soon head off to my bed
I must soon head off to my bed
Not before time it has to be said