Limericks. (New)

General Chat Games
981

Book ‘im Danno’ said Kojak
Can’t I just give 'im a smack?
As Theo sucked on his lolly
He looked a bit of a wally
Stood there is his flash-a-mack. :lol:

A policeman stopped me today

982

A policeman stopped me today
Not before time I say

983

A policeman stopped me today
Not before time I say
He pulled out his truncheon

984

A policeman stopped me today
Not before time I say
He pulled out his truncheon
And out fell his luncheon

985

A policeman stopped me today
Not before time I say
He pulled out his truncheon
And out fell his luncheon
Along with his pepper spray.

Then he had the cheek to blame me

986

Then he had the cheek to blame me
For spilling his cup of tea

987

Then he had the cheek to blame me
For spilling his cup of tea
whilst squashing his cake

988

Then he had the cheek to blame me
For spilling his cup of tea
whilst squashing his cake
And breaking his Flake

989

Then he had the cheek to blame me
For spilling his cup of tea
whilst squashing his cake
And breaking his Flake
And doubling the entendreeee

Whilst out for a walk round the church

990

Whilst out for a walk round the church
I spied someone up in the silver birch

991

Whilst out for a walk round the church
I spied someone up in the silver birch
It was the Duke of York

992

Whilst out for a walk round the church
I spied someone up in the silver birch
It was the Duke of York
A right royal dork

993

Whilst out for a walk round the church
I spied someone up in the silver birch
It was the Duke of York
A right royal dork
Who looked just a little like Lurch.

I went on the hunt for a ladder

994

I went on the hunt for a ladder
Cos the Duke wanted to empty his bladder

995

I went on the hunt for a ladder
Cos the Duke wanted to empty his bladder
So with ladder and wellies

996

I went on the hunt for a ladder
Cos the Duke wanted to empty his bladder
So with ladder and wellies
And a frock that was Nellie’s

997

I went on the hunt for a ladder
Cos the Duke wanted to empty his bladder
So with ladder and wellies
And a frock that was Nellie’s
He tripped and flattened an Adder

Is there an end to crap on TV?

998

Is there an end to crap on TV?
Not if it’s on the BBC

999

Is there an end to crap on TV?
Not if it’s on the BBC
Their boss needs a kick

1000

Is there an end to crap on TV?
Not if it’s on the BBC
Their boss needs a kick
And a clout with a big stick