Limericks. (New)

Chicken Casserole tonight for me tea
with half a potato and a pea
With a nice glass of red
And a big chunk of bread

Chicken Casserole tonight for me tea
with half a potato and a pea
With a nice glass of red
And a big chunk of bread
Sounds like a good plan to me

One night I decided to go

One night I decided to go
For a naked walk in the snow

One night I decided to go
For a naked walk in the snow
I slipped on some ice

One night I decided to go
For a naked walk in the snow
I slipped on some ice
And me bum I did slice

One night I decided to go
For a naked walk in the snow
I slipped on some ice
And me bum I did slice
And in the dark it really did glow

An ugly old woman called Janet

An ugly old woman called Janet
Arrived from another planet

An ugly old woman called Janet
Arrived from another planet
Take me to your leader said she

An ugly old woman called Janet
Arrived from another planet
Take me to your leader said she
And I’d also like a cup of your tea
Then she sat and ate like a gannet.

'Twas a dark and chilly night

Twas a dark and chilly night
When a witch hoved into sight

Twas a dark and chilly night
When a witch hoved into sight
She cackled with glee

Twas a dark and chilly night
When a witch hoved into sight
She cackled with glee
Then made me some tea

Twas a dark and chilly night
When a witch hoved into sight
She cackled with glee
Then made me some tea
Then flashed and sure gave me a fright

They say a new broom will sweep clean

They say a new broom will sweep clean
But do you really know what they mean

They say a new broom will sweep clean
But do you really know what they mean
Someone takes a fresh look

They say a new broom will sweep clean
But do you really know what they mean
Someone takes a fresh look
And a brand new handbook

They say a new broom will sweep clean
But do you really know what they mean
Someone takes a fresh look
And a brand new handbook
At least you will see where you’ve been

The judge said now look here young man

The judge said now look here young man
You were ordered to stop but you ran

The judge said now look here young man
You were ordered to stop but you ran
It’s locked up for you

The judge said now look here young man
You were ordered to stop but you ran
It’s locked up for you
And your mate, too