Limericks. (New)

Fred fancied a walk into town
Wearing his tartan dressing gow
With slippers to match

Fred fancied a walk into town
Wearing his tartan dressing gow
With slippers to match
He looked quite a catch

Fred fancied a walk into town
Wearing his tartan dressing gown
With slippers to match
He looked quite a catch
In fact he looked almost full grown

He thought he’d pop in for a coffee

He thought he’d pop in for a coffee
And perhaps a slice of Banoffee

He thought he’d pop in for a coffee
And maybe a slice of banoffee :pie:

He thought he’d pop in for a coffee
And perhaps a slice of Banoffee
The coffee was cold

He thought he’d pop in for a coffee
And perhaps a slice of Banoffee
The coffee was cold
And the banoffee had mould :nauseated_face:

He thought he’d pop in for a coffee
And perhaps a slice of Banoffee
The coffee was cold
And the banoffee had mould
In anger he threw it at me.

I went to the shop for some bread.

I went to the shop for some bread
Then bumped into Eric instead

I went to the shop for some bread
Then bumped into Eric instead
He told me some news

I went to the shop for some bread
Then bumped into Eric instead
He told me some news
He had booked a cruise

I went to the shop for some bread
Then bumped into Eric instead
He told me some news
He had booked a cruise
But mislaid the tickets in his shed!

You can imagine he was in a frantic state :hot_face::hot_face:

You can imagine he was in a frantic state
He was worried about being late

You can imagine he was in a frantic state
He was worried about being late
He searched high and low

You can imagine he was in a frantic state
He was worried about being late
He searched high and low
And shouted ‘Oh no’

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You can imagine he was in a frantic state
He was worried about being late
He searched high and low
And shouted ‘Oh no’
That cruise ship just won’t wait

Eric found them in the loo

Eric found them in the loo
little & long and stuck with glue

Eric found them in the loo
little & long and stuck with glue
So a taxi he rang