There was a young lady from Ryde
Whose boyfriend came from Clyde
There was a young lady from Ryde
Whose boyfriend came from Clyde
They’d been courting for a year
There was a young lady from Ryde
Whose boyfriend came from Clyde
They’d been courting for a year
But he liked his beer
There was a young lady from Ryde
Whose boyfriend came from Clyde
They’d been courting for a year
But he liked his beer
And then she found out he lied!
“I shall have to show him the door”
I shall have to show him the door
I can’t stand him any more
I shall have to show him the door
I can’t stand him any more
I know, I’ll write him a letter 
I shall have to show him the door
I can’t stand him any more
I know, I’ll write him a letter
It’ll be easier, and better
I shall have to show him the door
I can’t stand him any more
I know, I’ll write him a letter
It’ll be easier, and better
This “love” malarkey is really a bore
So she knocked on the door of the Convent 
So she knocked on the door of the Convent
Further sins she wanted to prevent
[quote=“Chillie6, post:6889, topic:58188, full:true”]
So she knocked on the door of the Convent
Further sins she wanted to prevent
But no one was in
So she knocked on the door of the Convent
Further sins she wanted to prevent
But no one was in
So she lived in sin
So she knocked on the door of the Convent
Further sins she wanted to prevent
But no one was in
So she lived in sin
The feeling was just heaven-sent! 
She got on the Number Ten Bus
She got on the Number Ten Bus
And then she started to cuss
She got on the Number Ten Bus
And then she started to cuss
“I’m ruined!” she cried
She got on the Number Ten Bus
And then she started to cuss
“I’m ruined!” she cried
I feel funny inside
[quote=“Boot, post:6895, topic:58188, full:true”]
She got on the Number Ten Bus
And then she started to cuss
“I’m ruined!” she cried
I feel funny inside
But I don’t want to make any fuss.
She started to feel quite queazy
She started to feel quite queasy
And her bottom burps smelled quite cheesy
Judd you’re a disgrace!!!
She started to feel quite queasy
And her bottom burps smelled quite cheesy
The others on the bus
-
Grotty old toe rag isn’t he, Ruthio.
She started to feel quite queasy
And her bottom burps smelled quite cheesy
The others on the bus
Started to make a fuss
- Grotty old toe rag isn’t he, Ruthio.
He is! Lowers the tone of the forum!
She started to feel quite queasy
And her bottom burps smelled quite cheesy
The others on the bus
Started to make a fuss
They all vacated the bus easy peasy!
So she was on her own yet again