Limericks. (New)

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6301

Now Ann was a bit of a frump
Who looked like she had a big lump
As her bum was so big

6302

Now Ann was a bit of a frump
Who looked like she had a big lump
As her bum was so big
It resembled a pig

6303

Now Ann was a bit of a frump
Who looked like she had a big lump
As her bum was so big
It resembled a pig
But say nowt - or youā€™ll get a thump!

Sid fancied a swim in the lake

6304

Sid fancied a swim in the lake
But no Cossie did he take

6305

Sid fancied a swim in the lake
But no Cossie did he take
Bare-arsed was he

6306

Sid fancied a swim in the lake
ā€¦But no Cossie did he take
Bare-arsed was he
Yes, but I say, let him be

6307

Sid fancied a swim in the lake
ā€¦But no Cossie did he take
Bare-arsed was he
Yes, but I say, let him be
And his tan washed off - it was fake!

Then a rowing boat came into sight

6308

Then a rowing boat came into sight
With all his might, the oar was upright

6309

Then a rowing boat came into sight
With all his might, the oar was upright
The young damsel on board

6310

Then a rowing boat came into sight
With all his might, the oar was upright
The young damsel on board
Then shouted oh Gawd

6311

Then a rowing boat came into sight
With all his might, the oar was upright
The young damsel on board
Then shouted oh Gawd
'Cos seeing Sid naked gave her a fright.

ā€œI canā€™t lookā€ cried the lass, blushing bright red

6312

ā€œI canā€™t lookā€ cried the lass, blushing bright red,
Iā€™ll never get that out of my head.

6313

I canā€™t lookā€ cried the lass, blushing bright red,
Iā€™ll never get that out of my head.
What was it she saw

1 Like
6314

I canā€™t lookā€ cried the lass, blushing bright red,
Iā€™ll never get that out of my head.
What was it she saw
That made her guffaw?

6315

I canā€™t lookā€ cried the lass, blushing bright red,
Iā€™ll never get that out of my head.
What was it she saw
That made her guffaw?
It was long floppy and looked quite dead

That was a funny place to keep a snake

1 Like
6316

That was a funny place to keep a snake
Sid quickly realized his mistake

6317

That was a funny place to keep a snake
Sid quickly realized his mistake
But instead of keeping shtum

6318

That was a funny place to keep a snake
Sid quickly realised his mistake
But instead of keeping shtum
He kept the snake in his room

6319

That was a funny place to keep a snake
Sid quickly realised his mistake
But instead of keeping shtum
He kept the snake in his room
And fed it a fresh slice of cake

Now Sid was a man of few words

6320

Now Sid was a man of few words
Preferring to listen to the sound of the birds