A young girl came to his aid
Luckily, a big strong milkmaid
She helped Ted to his feet
He was white as a sheet
A young girl came to his aid
Luckily, a big strong milkmaid
She helped Ted to his feet
He was white as a sheet
As she administered first aid
An ambulance had to be called
An ambulance had to be called
And off the floor he was hauled
An ambulance had to be called
And off the floor he was hauled
He was rushed straight away
An ambulance had to be called
And off the floor he was hauled
He was rushed straight away
To the A&E bay
An ambulance had to be called
And off the floor he was hauled
He was rushed straight away
To the A&E bay
Where his pants were found to be soiled
A priest was called for poor Ted
A priest was called for poor Ted
Who, by now. had wet the bed
A priest was called for poor Ted
Who, by now. had wet the bed
The priest read Ted the last rites
A priest was called for poor Ted
Who, by now. had wet the bed
The priest read Ted the last rites
Not convincing wearing tights
A priest was called for poor Ted
Who, by now. had wet the bed
The priest read Ted the last rites
Not convincing wearing tights
So he took them off instead.
When Maisie moved down to Bude
When Maisie moved down to Bude
She found the menfolk quite crude
When Maisie moved down to Bude
She found the menfolk quite rude
But it didnāt take long
A nice cup of tea goes down well
Put your feet up for a spell
FM, sorry, but weāre supposed to add just one line from the previous personās verse.
Then the person who writes the last line, starts the next limerick. 
When Maisie moved down to Bude
She found the menfolk quite rude
But it didnāt take long
For her to get along
When Maisie moved down to Bude
She found the menfolk quite rude
But it didnāt take long
For her to get along
With the ladies, who were not so crude.
Whilst walking around the town one day
Whilst walking around the town today
I tripped, slipped, then fell in the bay
Whilst walking around the town today
I tripped, slipped, then fell in the bay
I floundered about
Whilst walking around the town today
I tripped, slipped, then fell in the bay
I floundered about
Then decided to shout
Whilst walking around the town today
I tripped, slipped, then fell in the bay
I floundered about
Then decided to shout
Before the tide would sweep me away
To my relief there arrived the coastguard
To my relief there arrived the coastguard
Who declared that tourists should be barred