Limericks. (New)

but from there they were banned

The Squire’s family were rich
And originally came from Redditch
But from there they were banned
For being too grand

The Squire’s family were rich
And originally came from Redditch
But from there they were banned
For being too grand
And for the mother being a bitch

They looked down their noses at Maud

They looked down their noses at Maud
She had three double chins and was bald

They looked down their noses at Maud
She had three double chins and was bald
Though her heart was of gold

her demeanor was cold

They looked down their noses at Maud
She had three double chins and was bald
Though her heart was of gold
Her demeanor was cold
And she was only as tall as she was broad.

Her downsides then, were many

Her downsides then, were many
Her qualities? There weren’t any

Her downsides then, were many
Her qualities? There weren’t any
Exept she couldn’t half flirt

Her downsides then, were many
Her qualities? There weren’t any
Except she couldn’t half flirt
And she was as cheap as dirt

Her downsides then, were many
Her qualities? There weren’t any
Except she couldn’t half flirt
And she was as cheap as dirt
Only costing the Squire a penny.

But in fact, he was smitten

But in fact, he was smitten
And to prove it he’d written

But in fact, he was smitten
And to prove it he’d written
A letter to her pledging love

But in fact, he was smitten
And to prove it he’d written
A letter to her pledging love
And promising to dispose of

Hmm, you’ve got me there, Tango :slight_smile: ^^^^
Can anyone else manage this?

But in fact, he was smitten
And to prove it he’d written
A letter to her pledging love
And promising to dispose of
The blow up doll he’d been given :blush: :lol:

Receiving his letter Maud was impressed

Hah. Well done Barry. :lol:

Receiving his letter Maud was impressed
She felt years younger, and full of zest

Receiving his letter Maud was impressed
She felt years younger, and full of zest
She bought lingerie

Receiving his letter Maud was impressed
She felt years younger, and full of zest
She bought lingerie
To look her best on the day

Receiving his letter Maud was impressed
She felt years younger, and full of zest
She bought lingerie
To look her best on the day
And gave him some fun, he felt blessed

In a matter of months they were wed