Limericks. (New)

A crowd soon gathered around
With cries of laughter abound
So he dried all his tears
And slapped my ears

A crowd soon gathered around
With cries of laughter abound
So he dried all his tears
And slapped my ears
So I knocked him flat to the ground!

The police were immediately called

The police were immediately called
But their enquiries soon stalled

The police were immediately called
But their enquiries soon stalled
They didn’t have a clue

The police were immediately called
But their enquiries soon stalled
They didn’t have a clue
Then out of the blue

The police were immediately called
But their enquiries soon stalled
They didn’t have a clue
Then out of the blue
Down to the cop-shop I was hauled

After a night in the cells

After a night in the cells
I noticed the sound of loud bells

After a night in the cells
I noticed the sound of loud bells
The fire alarm had gone off

After a night in the cells
I noticed the sound of loud bells
The fire alarm had gone off
When suddenly David Hasselhoff

After a night in the cells
I noticed the sound of loud bells
The fire alarm had gone off
When suddenly David Hasselhoff
Burst in and started to yell.

" You must let that woman go" said he

You must let that woman go" said he
Her job is to make coffee and tea

You must let that woman go" said he
Her job is to make coffee and tea
She may poison your drink

You must let that woman go" said he
Her job is to make coffee and tea
She may poison your drink
What? While she’s in the clink?

You must let that woman go said he
Her job is to make coffee and tea
She may poison your drink
What? While she’s in the clink?
Oh well, what will be will be.

Deleted…

As Ted sat nodding off in his chair

As Ted sat nodding off in his chair
His missus came in and gave him a stare

As Ted sat nodding off in his chair
His missus came in and gave him a stare
Oh how he did snore

As Ted sat nodding off in his chair
His missus came in and gave him a stare
Oh how he did snore
like Dongles, the bore,