Gummy, that was a Peach.
Well done lads.
I see the poets are all firing away
About life and the very last day
We have broken down loo’s
And left over screws
A lorry stuck on an icy street
Frozen fingers and smelly feet
Tubes, U-turns and hall clocks
U-bends spanners and ballcocks
Where will it end, who can tell
Will it be in heaven or in hell.
Isn’t that Bear grylls a terrific chap, all the things he can do.
For instance can you light a fire without a match or a lighter, make a raft from tree branches, skin and cook a wild animal, make a tomahawk from a stone and stick held together with snake intestines, find water in the desert, make warm clothing from animal hides, snare fish with a wooden spear?
I’m off tomorrow to take a trip along the canal with my grandsons to educate them in ancient skills, I’ve already taught them how to saw off the roof of an old car, turn it upside down and use it as a boat, tomorrow we’ll gather some reeds from the side of the canal to weave a wicker chair for their granny then make some pan pipes from what’s left over to serenade her to sleep, Bear Grylls ain’t got nothin on me.
Are bare grills, bare larders, and bare cupboards related or just the result of too much austerity? not to mention bare bellies bare feet, and possibly bare arses.
What cosmic serendipity caused this gathering of wrinklies to burst forth & grow into the illustrious group posting here. Gummy you are right on the spot today.
yes this thread often brings me out in spots
I’ll have you lot know,
that,as as events go,
our meeting on here was
auspicious.
We’ve discussed life’s events
without getting too tense,
or anyone being malicious.
There’s been discussions of mead
and in times of need,
advice on just how to cope.
Plus jokes,jests and quips,
at life’s little nips,
all of which give renewed hope.
But to me the best bit
is that even life’s shit,
becomes fodder for our wide-ranging scope.
oh dear I didn’t realize you were listening - they last time I looked across the room you were engrossed with painting ya toenails - so engrossed I thought - impervious to idle chatter - dear lady how can I put this ??? ahem - we need a mascot - a sweetie pie for our leisurely dribbles - sorry scribbles - we won’t bite - pugs a big old pussycat where the ladies are concerned - RJ of course the perfect gentleman; Jem - a gem of a man - and spittie well he’s just spittie but don’t worry we’ll handle 'im
and then there is moi " voulez vous promenade avec moi" my sweet one??? 
OI!
I’m a gennelman too,y’know!
Why,only yesterday I was waiting to cross a road beside an elderly lady pedestrian of the female variety,when an out-of-control bus came careering along the road…and like a true-born gentleman,I shov…er…I mean,I allowed that little old lady to cross ahead of me!
I’m in awe
Will you be my role model?
Morning/afternoon/evening GUMMY (delete inapplicable options)
don’t you mean road model?
he once was a lollipop man
but was quickly removed from the scene
he would get crossing full
then wave traffic through
the injury stats were obscene!
OMG you been swearing again Robert ?
I had a nice stroll along the Royal Canal today, it was not too cold and I enjoyed feeding a pair of Swans, they were very hungry and the stale half sliced pan I brought with me didn’t last long, still I was pleased I had done my good deed for the day.
As I passed old Kerrigans field on the way back home I saw a herd of Cows joyfully nibbling the lush green grass, they looked so contented and were all singing “Amazing Grazing”
I know nothing about equations but there is a plaque on Broombridge with this on it, I took a snap of it for Pug and Fruitcake they know all about this stuff.
https://s26.postimg.org/5b84tijyh/Broombridge-plaque-_BDolan-2010-web_copy.jpg
Merry Christmas to you guys.
https://i.pinimg.com/736x/de/70/3b/de703be22f1398d5d266b1351b27c35c--funny-christmas-wishes-funny-christmas-cartoons.jpg
Thank you oh sweet one. I’m not forgetting anyone, I’m waiting until the 24th to do me Christmas card and wish you all the seasons greetings.
The eldest grandson bought a pair of shoes today, they cost him a bomb in one of Dublin’s most fashionable shops in posh Grafton Street called Brown Thomas, the lad is mad about brand names, although I was very particular what I wore when I was 18, think I had an expensive pair of winkle pickers back then, cost me a weeks wages.:shock:
It reminded me of an old Dublin joke from the 60’s that went.
“What has Muhammad Ali and Grafton street got in common?”
“They both have Brown Thomas’s”
Needless to say he didn’t know what I was talking about, two generations out.
Bit like this thread.
thank you SP goin away for chrissie??
ah as the years fly by - remember having a screaming argument with Ma about the purchase of a pair of green fluorescent socks - I won that one but couldn’t get the blue suede shoes!
Just a word of caution to all my chums to be careful and cautious over Xmas!!
Bill had worked in a pickle factory for years, one day he came home and said to his wife, " I’ve got this urge to stick my penis into the pickle slicer", his wife replied," that’s definitely not right I think you need to see the doctor, you need professional help, " a couple of weeks later bill comes home, ashen faced and worried, “what’s wrong” asks his wife," well you know I had that urge to stick my penis into the pickle slicer, well today I did it" " oh my god" replied his wife" what happened", " I got fired" bill replied, " what about the pickle slicer" asked his wife," oh, she got fired too," said bill