Ha ha,that made Me laugh out loud Pug…I love the smell of Pipe Tobacco and there’s something comforting about a Man who smokes a pipe…Keep on rantin’ and puffin’ 
Note the simpleton test about the name of the Scottish play, if you knew it was Macbeth you do not qualify as a true simpleton.
Larry and Dickie would not be amused…“What’s done cannot be undone” 
Indeed they would not May, it pays in these literary circles to know your Larry’s from your Dickie’s.
[my apologies for that steam-release…just laid my dear pooch [Lofty] to rest.
Loved him for years,God bless him. I’m having to bite any letters myself now.
NOT an excuse,merely an explanation. So,apologies to all]
Now…Jem…since when,zackly,has ‘The Scottish Play’ become Hamlet,m’deah fellow? Dyah DYAH Dickeh & I await your answer with cubic zirconium studded anticipation. [exits,stage left…]
I am truly sorry about your beloved Lofty Pug, I really thought he would make it through.
The answer to the Scottish play is in post 262, I’m sorry Pug dear fellow but you will never make a simpleton, next!…
I’m told that David was meant to Sir’d but Dickie got made up by mistake.
I often have to smile when I visit some of the art galleries in town, especially the modern art galleries, people are talking out loud to their companions about how they interpret the artists work, trying ever so hard to impress “He was determined to get his message across here, just look at the heavy brush strokes on the villains face” This was a huge painting this couple were looking at, I couldn’t even make out a face, but I think I saw a pair of boobs, there’s always a bum or a pair of boobs in these paintings with maybe a big eye thrown in.
It’s too easy to slag off this kind of art and I won’t, each to their own tastes, I really have tried to like and understand it but I’m afraid I failed miserably, for some reason it always looks to me like the work of someone who call themselves an artist but cannot draw or paint pictures we all know and understand, if they are trying to show us what’s in their mind why not get a head X-ray and colour it in, it would look just as good as their paintings and more believable in the sense that everyone would know what it was.
I’ll never forget what that famous French modern artist Aven de Mon said in an interview with Malcolm Muggeridge on BBC TV “It’s what I don’t put into my paintings that sells them, people will see what they want to see” How true Aven, and thank Aven for little girls, they grow up in the most delightful way.
Michael Mac Liammoir and that English gentleman actor Hilton Edwards in a joint venture opened a theatre here back in the 1950’s, the pair of them were gay, illegal at that time. The Theatre was called “The Gate” and is still going strong, the standing joke at the time was that if you called to the Gate and asked to see Michael Mac Liammoir you were told “Sorry, he’s up to his Hilton Edwards”
Scuze MOI old bean!
I was strolling past a bakery this very morrow,when I dids’t espy a loaf in the window of aforementioned establishment which,to my delight,bore the name I am so often called!!!
[although,on closer,more languid observation,I realised it actually said "Thick CUT’’]
Still,close call,methinks…
ps…May;I think I love you…#sigh…
Was Simon really Simple, or just after a free Pie?
And, more to the point, if it wasn’t Simon, who DID eat all the Pies…Man.
This thread[such an inadequate word) has of late developed a gravitas justly fitting of it’s illustrious contributors and reminding me of the late, great journalist Alistair Cooke.
Pies have been the stable diet of Simpletons down through the ages Spitty. Whoever invented the pie was a genius, you can put anything into a pie and folks will eat it, what an ideal way to get rid of unpalatable food, just stuff it all into a pie that has a lovely golden crust of pastry.
My hero and to me the Simpleton-in-chief, Desperate Dan of Dandy fame preferred the Cow Pie above all others, Dan, a man big on strength but small on brains always won the day, he would have spasms of sheer brilliance like using the two Cowhorns that came with his pies as a knife and fork, but it would have been cleverer to use the pointed ends. Sweeney Todd supposedly dispatched his unwanted corpses to a Mrs Miggins who specialised in exotic pies, indeed it was said of her that she had a finger in every pie, all pie in the sky perhaps, but do we ever really know whats in a pie we haven’t baked ourselves?
Who was that singing gobshite who left the pie out in the rain? there’s nothing as unappetising as a soggy pie.
Ah yes,Alistair Cooke…a great man indeed.
He wrote a letter from America,y’know.
That poor pigeon was knackered when it finally reached Blighty.
The shame of it is,if he hadn’t been so consumed by using 'E’s,he could’ve played cricket for England! [Ai thenkyoh]
Alister Cooke, that name rings a bell, wasn’t he the one eyed fella who discovered Australia?, the size of it, a whole continent, Christ how could he miss it.
I have a comment re the discovery of OZ, no one discovered it cos it was already there.
The Brits exploited it, sent their riff raff there, helped destroy the indigenous people & their culture.
That is all i have to say on this matter.
I don’t know why I bothered to post this.Tomorrow i’ll be more positive.
Valid point RJ, just down the road, residents occupy houses built on fields, but, get up in arms when subsequent homes are built on adjacent fields, it is good to relate historical events to local issues.
Yep-what HE said. I remember when it were all fields,around here!
…well,actually,it still is-but them’s the perks of owning an island…
Every available piece of land around here is being built on, there were Reps from building companies going around the houses offering big money to buy large gardens to build another house on, a few sold their gardens and another house was squashed in, we were offered 150,000 E for our big side garden, the missus had great fun bargaining on the phone, she had no intentions of selling but she loves that sort of thing, no way do I want someone living up me backside at my age.
Phyllis is very two faced when it comes to speaking on the phone she has a special telephone voice she uses when she’s talking to strangers “Hell loo, to whom am I speaking?, oh yes I see, well I am afraid my husband is unavailable at present, out on important business…blah blah blah…” Then when I come home I’ll ask was there any calls for me “Just some geezer wanting a repair job done, same bloke who stung yeh before, told him feck off”