There are many chancers, but if they have charm, and plausibility, it can form a career, if the chancer does not have these credentials, they have to work for a living.
Aged 13 or 14 I had a Saturday job in a pet shop run by
Ida & Ethel and they worked in the shop until the day they died. Ethel at 97 & Ida at 94.
Retiring was an alien concept
Ida was a debutante in her younger years & had a marvellous sense of fun, and would answer the phone thus.
Bermondsey fire station, can I help you?"
or
" Battersea Dog’s Home"
On a quiet day she’d order me t o run along adjoining streets yelling.
“Birds going cheap”
SHe had been manager of the shop from 1929 until her demise in 2000, 71 years what a gal!
Hey ho I’m falling asleep here
more later
I love to hear about characters like Ida and Ethel, they are the salt of the earth.
You reminded me of a bird joke that if you told it today nobody would get it.
The young lad was looking at the Budgies in the pet shop and they all seemed the same to him so he asked the man behind the counter “Mister, why are the ones up on top dearer than the ones at the bottom?” Because the ones on the top are on higher perches son”
Nobody does hire purchase anymore, they have fancy names for getting something on the never never now, everyones in debt whether they realise it or not, as you lie in bed sleeping your energy bill is mounting and your taxes and cable bill too, you are actually borrowing the energy and you pay for it when you get your bill, but nobody would admit to borrowing these days, strange creatures these human beings.
I’m on a ‘Bundle’ with the cable company now, they got lots of bundles on offer, gee it feels great being on a bundle.
It figures, the older you get, the more you should borrow, as there is a good chance you won’t have to pay it all back:-)
In the next life, I would have liked to have been a black, one legged, Brazilian mythical creature or a Badger, but me old Dad always said “Spitty, never a Lenda or a Burrower be”
In some ways the old git was very wise:lol:
I find that when someone like meself comes from a poor background they tend to avoid debt in later life. It seems to me now that the powers that be encourage one to be in debt, people in debt are more controllable and tend to toe the company line, it’s like an invisible anchor that holds them down in the one place, anything to avoid losing their jobs and not being able to repay the debts. There is something deep down about debt that haunts the poorer classes, they hate being in debt and that’s to their credit in my opinion.
I remember when I was in my twenties and working for this youngish man, he was all ‘go ahead’ and as he used to regularly say “What we need in business today is new thinking, new thinking” You would think he was the director of the bank of England instead of a Mickey Mouse workshop with ten employees. His new thinking ideas of what a goldsmiths wages should be were in need of a rethink as far as I was concerned, and my new thinking was to get meself out of there to somewhere more financially fertile.
He got wind of my secret plans through some lickarse planted in the workshop and I was called to his office. He was as nice as pie to me, offered me a cigar and poured a brandy from a bottle he kept in his desk drawer. After enquiring about the wife and the two small kids, we were living with the mother in law at the time, he suggested he advance me the deposit on a new house. I immediately copped on to his scheme and was out of there and settled into a far better position within two weeks. Beware of geeks baring gifts.:-)
I think the standard of writing in here has reached dizzy new heights. I am in awe.
Well that’s killed it , I meant it kindly.
Not quite RJ, you don’t get off that lightly ;-), the torture continues, this scribbler has been very busy of late, up to me eyes in it in fact, hence the long pauses.
You gave me an idea, a new series called “Withering Sights” All about five old chaps on an over 50’s forum, watch this space for the first short episode, Last of the Summer Wine will only be in the ha’penny place.
Splendid news Jem, you’re turning into our own personal national treasure.
These faux book titles came to my mind.
Gullible travails
Withering slights.
the 38 steps
…Lucky Jem
If we’re making a film, I wish to be cast in a roll akin to the Johnny Henshaw-Jacobs character in Airplane…Darlings.
Only NOT as camp.
"Infamy, Infamy,…they’ve all got it in for me!
…or how about a fillum about 5 waggish lads,heading to the glorious delights of London and their adventures as they travel via the glorious mode known as British Rail? Hmm? I already have the title-all we need is a story.
…“Rakes On A Train” yes,yes,I know-you’re underwhelmed. Oh,well…
Where’s GUMBUD?
Great idea PUG, we’ll call you…
I like the sound of that, would there be much inferred testosterone fuelled tension?
A thought entered me head after hearing a talk on the radio while I was working, it was all about collecting things.
I used to collect masks from all over the World, I ran out of space to hang them so I sold them off, I only got face value for them.
My Mother used to collect Terry Towelling Nappies, they were worth good money till the Disposable ones were invented, and the Bottom Dropped out of the Market.
While on the subject of babies, when I was born I was so ugly that the midwife slapped my mother instead of me.
Spitty I lost my sense of smell years ago, but the mention of dirty nappies gaver me a momentary whiff of the unmistakeable acrid, vile intense smell of baby yellow poo.
thanks for small mercies eh?
Ok gennelmen-I can tell you weren’t overly excited by my 1st idea.
SO…I givvit some thort - then I givvit some more thought…
and,[you’ll LOVE thissun RJ]-it’s got the lot ,combining testosterone-fuelled rucks,squeaky female love-interest,imminent danger,dire consequence of failure AND a built-in but inferred sense of being merely bit-players in nature’s grandiosity,as the futility of attempting to placate displaced venom is laid bare…
“Wasp In A Car!”