I am, in another time and another place I would have been a God
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Winner of the 3.30 at Kempton.Can I have my money now please.Cash would be acceptable.
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Mad bugger! 
Tuts at not being appreciated…especially as I worked so hard looking at places to point at…in this heat too 
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I will pencil you in for recognition at the upcoming Awards ceremony
So that’s a no then
I’ll be checking with Spiely for work.I’ll be happy to give you a ment.
I know the feeling, Summer, I have been abandoned! Let’s jetison the rum ration - that’ll learn 'im!
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Aye maybe its time to talk mutiny 
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Oh Yes !! 
If we are mutinying my I have a plain chocolate bounty please Mr Christian.
G.O.A.T! and Gucci! Wanna come over and get matching tats, watch Netflix and do balloons? 
If he says no - I have a secret stash in my 'fridge - am happy to share!
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Delicious curried!
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Isn’t it just, I’ve just thrown a whole one on the fire for tonight’s tribal banquet, it makes a nice change from random visitors, ‘cos they can get a bit tough………
Goats are Greatest Of All Time 
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Thank you, we could compare colour wheels too 
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You are all bored right? This insurrection will cease and no more goat recipes
Moving on
Enuff ‘, says Chiefess Mups,’ where are the Prezzies’?
‘Where is the hidden Shed’? I retort, despite its proven stress-relieving effect, I do not indulge in maniacal laughter. (Overlords tend to do a lot of that, but when so occupied, it’s too easy to miss unexpected developments that a more attentive individual could adjust to accordingly.)
‘The hidden Shed you seek, ‘ O chosen one is hidden on the Mountain of Despair beyond the River of Fire guarded by the Dragons of Eternity’.
Bugger! I thought, I bloody knew it!
Things were not going too smoothly. (I needed a pint and an easier story line.)
I offered my gifts saying. "O’ Chiefess Mups I bring gifts from the 4 corners of the Earth. (4 Corners? No I don’t know either.) ‘The Great White Queen from the East sends salutations’ (Unfortunately these had been washed overboard with the gnomes during the Great Storm) ‘I offer unto you this ancient Army Blanket which has been handed down from father to son (and smelled like it) for generations’
I also offered her the two tins of Spam; both these offerings were immediately dispatched into the communal cooking pot, where a particularly nasty looking missionary was being curried. I then proffered the black and white picture of a piece of toast, I giggled as I saw the Chiefess looking at it upside down, " Is that it"? Mups asked, "We are not amused. It’s the duel of death for you matey"
(Note: Have you noticed that in every epic there is always a Duel of death?)
Being quick off the block and faster than Stephen Hawking with freshly charged batteries I responded;
"Then I, under UN resolution 104 I demand the choice of Weapons of Mass Distraction" I reply with a sneer. "And I choose", says I thinking quickly, " The scene from Dr. No, where James Bond is handcuffed to a Nuclear Bomb, with one of those red digital countdown things counting down, ok"? Chiefess Mups is not to chuffed with this and elects to play her joker. She nominates her right hand man, Psmith as a temporary champion . (Note: Very temporary)
In Part X and Final Part
The Duel of Death.
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Ey . . . What . …?
I was just going out the door and I heard my name called.
What’s this all about? Has someone got me some pressies, did you say?
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Do try and catch up will you?
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Can I have the army blanket?