[quote=“gumbud, post: 617329”]
OK topic switch for a mo - wot are the three topics that should never be discussed online?? - politics; religion and cow pats!
If I can just step in Gumbud,
The reason why both religion and politics cause so much trouble when trying to address them is; they are both the same…
Politics is someone telling you that they can make life better for you on a national scale…Religion is someone telling you they can make your life better on a Global scale…and beyond…
Now lets discuss ‘Cow Pats’ are they cows that have gone to live somewhere else…as in [Ex-pats]
Fortunately being a Townie Robert I don’t come across any Cow Pats in the city, quite a few Pats alright but no Cows.
When I was a boy the Farmers drove their Cattle right through the city on the way to the docks to be exported to Liverpool, all the kids would get a stout stick from one of the drovers and help keep the Cows in line, when we got to the boats we were all given a half crown, not bad for a kid in the 1950’s.
I knew I had a photo somewhere, this one is coloured in but it gives you and idea, I live very close to where this photo was taken, notice the boys on the left. The number 10 tram was the last of the city trams to go, it went from the city centre up to the Zoo in the Phoenix Park. http://i736.photobucket.com/albums/xx4/jemflux/PastedGraphic-3.jpg
Very nice photo Jem, I was born in 1950 and recall Doncaster having trams similar to the one in the picture. I notice the drover wearing a white shirt and tie, would this just be for his visit to the city? or would that be his normal attire? As an apprentice Engineer, I worked along side some old Toolmakers who always wore shirt and tie.
Half a crown was a princely sum in those days, I received half a crown for my paper round in 1963.
Why don’t they say birthday box instead of present
Half moon instead of crescent
Christmas box you always hear
But birthday box is out of ear.
I didnt know what to get for the little 2 year old grandson for his birthday tomorrow, so I left it up to the wife, aren’t they great at such things, I’d be lost without her guidance, sure pays to have spare ribs hanging around, that was a good idea you had there God, pity you had to make their mouths so big though, maybe you could make a few adjustments on the next model, an old fashioned on/off switch would be handy too, otherwise you did a great job.
[FONT=Calibri]have a habit , only just recently pointed out to me.[/FONT]
[FONT=Calibri]I can’t help myself from commenting whenever noticing people who look like someone else.[/FONT]
I suppose with people from all over the world shifting around these lovely Isles of ours than ever before we are bound to come across many doubles of folks we know, possibly trebles.
That reminds me, doubles and trebles in the bookies shop can get very complicated, some fellas do cross doubles and cross trebles and include an accumulator, a small outlay in the hope of a big return, but as me granny used to say “You’d want to have the sign of the cross on your back to that one up”.
Last March when the Cheltenham big meeting was on the shop was very busy, and as we don’t live very far from the national nut house (as the locals affectionally call the mental institution nearby) one of the inmates strolled in and placed a load of pebbles on the counter “I want to do three 20 pebble doubles and a 20 pebble treble” The poor girl behind the counter was a bag of nerves and shouted in to the manager, the manager was very busy making up bets and he shouted back to her “Just humour him and give him a blank docket and he’ll go away” she did as she was told and off went yerman. Next day he was in again shouting all over the place that his bet had come up and he was demanding payment immediately. The manager was a quick thinker and calmed him down, he then went out to the back were building renovations were going on and filled a sack full of gravel then brought it in to the delighted chap holding the docket. “There you are now sir” He smiled broadly and looked around at all the astonished customers. “Another satisfied customer”
The second day of the racing festival and in comes yerman struggling to get a huge rock onto the counter, he was just about to write out a docket when the manager charges out “Get the hell outa here you…your after getting a hot tip!”
Hard to tell one madman from another in these hard times ain’t it.
can we get this right once and for all - was there a big bang or wasn’t there a big bang?
I remember a story way back of a lady who had used the only solvent she could get her hands on to clean the outside loo. Her good husband went down there for his usual strain, daily mirror and fag - he lit the fag and you can imagine - his wife came to the back door and said “that was an awful big bang” as her hubbie staggered up the pathway with smoke coming out of his hair and clothing a glowing fag and the mirror on fire!
[CENTER][SIZE=“4”]FOR SALE[/SIZE]
[SIZE=“3”]A Hadron Collider
As new, with very little use
Comes complete with full instructions
Assemble your own universe…
Everyone will admire your Higgs Bosuns…[/SIZE][/CENTER]
Oh don’t get me started on Higgs Bosun Robert, as one scientist working there said “We don’t know what it is but I’m delighted we discovered it” Great, so where does that leave us now…square one beckons methinks.
I remember back in the old days of watching TV snooker, the wife passed a remark on Higgins Bottom, “Like two duck eggs in a hankie”
TO continue in this frivolous mode, I am reminded of the late George Melly’s autobiography entitled RUM, BUM & ACCORDIAN. referring to his navy career, his sexual preference & his music.
Now I can’t remember my train of thought. mebbe laters…
Ah George Melly, God be good to him, always came across to me as the type of man to be good company in a pub, jolly and full of interesting stories.
I heard, whether there’s any truth in it or not I don’t know, that he was a double adapter (Male and female partners) in his sex life. You would know RJ having read his story.
As for modern Jazz, to me it’s just musical Doggerel.
Now you come to mention it, having indeed read his lurid, sometimes turgid autobiography confirm that he swung both ways. Not at the same time though. He had a eureka moment whilst admiring a tightly clad bottom, belonging to a fit bloke just ahead of him on a bicycle.
Well, the bloke was a woman & he converted to heterosex.
I saw George Melly twice, in his final years, once with John Chisholm & once with Kenny Ball. He told exactly the same anecdotes at both gigs.
I didn’t mind.
Oh don’t get me started on Higgs Bosun Robert, as one scientist working there said “We don’t know what it is but I’m delighted we discovered it” Great, so where does that leave us now…square one beckons methinks.