Just for fun, pretend that you could get married all over again and do it at the perfect age. (if you’ve never been married, skip this part.]
Instead of at the time you were married, imagine you were getting married in this day and age with this culture and the priorities of the people in this time.
People have been waiting longer to get married because of financial issues, family obligations and general existential angst about the planet.
Knowing what you know from past experience and taking into account the current culture, what’s the perfect age to get married? You can assume the couple will want children or not.
If I did not want children, I would not consider marriage in this day and age. As for the prefect age, is there one? I did consider marriage to one young lady (prospective mother-in-law was amiable too) and then she upped sticks to attend uni in Edinburgh, leaving me down here in the south to my university. The old saying, absence makes the heart grow fonder did not apply to this young lady and I was side lined. A little later, enter literally stage left another young lady who not only captured my heart more fully and with more determination, she proposed to me and because we both wanted children straight away, it was not a long engagement. My four daughters made my marriage and they deserve some of the credit.
Now if I had not met my wife, would I have done anything different? I really do not know because I’ve never regretted a single day of marriage.
I don’t think people should feel obliged to get married these days. If the commitment to each other is there already…what does a ring and a piece of paper do to ease your mind for the reasons above?
I think people do still question the deliberate decisions people make regarding getting married or not, and deciding (or not) to have kids. I don’t think the couple in question should ever have to explain themselves, but yes, LD, the stigmas still prevail, sadly.
I was 24. A good age as I was grown up then, or thought I was.
OH & I got engaged & a few weeks later I was pregnant.
I was 5 months gone when we actually got married, it had already been planned, Mum wasn’t happy, she’d wanted us to get married sooner.
I never regretted any of it. We were married for nearly 50 years before he died.
This is why I asked. My eldest daughter lived with her other half for several years until it was obvious she was pregnant and then onlookers were almost crushed in the rush to gain that piece of paper.
