Can’t recall where I’ve seen this theme of discussion before. Had a look but can’t find on here ( sorry if it’s somewhere)
So, I went to my daughter’s friends house to do a bit of prep work in a spare bedroom (fill a few holes, level out radiator with a bracket that fell off the wall). Little things, and I’ll go back tomorrow to do second fill where plaster was deep and other bits n pieces.
I don’t think I’m asking too much for the room to be clear of sh!te so I can get on. After all, I’m not charging anything. By sh!te, I literally mean dog sh!t on the carpet, fresh from yesterday. First place I put my hands…you guessed it. Turned round to go and wash my hands and noticed dollop on it near the door (naturally, upon inspection some has got into the treads of my trainers). Went downstairs to kitchen, and there’s a puddle of pi$$ on the lino floor.
I’ve done jobs in the past for paying customers where I’ve had to empty eg bathrooms of soap, towels etc before ripping the fittings out, and even the bedsheets so I could remove the bed prior to plastering a ceiling.
But dog sh!t on a bedroom carpet is a first for me!!
Anyone else had similar experiences? Or would any of you think it’s OK to expect a tradesperson to have to shovel your sh!he so they could get on with the job?
I’ve worked as a carer, where the house was full of cat muck and riddled with fleas, …I could have refused, someone has to do it, I even ended up cleaning the whole house and being bitten by fleas in the process…I will never forget that poor elderly man’s house and it’s condition,I managed to gain his trust and even managed to get him into the barbers and shower.
I guess it’s up to you Dex…has she mental health problems ?
Sorry, Dex, but I’d have turned round and walked out. No way would I do a favour for someone as disgustingly lazy as this. She’s not only not paying you, but she’s not respecting you either. Bloody cheek
@Maree , no I didn’t mention it, because she was still in bed as heaven forbid she should try and get up before or during my time there to offer a drink, yet alone help.
My daughter ended up cleaning up the poo while I got stuck into the work. Since I’d loosened the pipework to lay the radiator flat (and tightened the pipework at that point) so I could work on the bracket, I naturally pulled the carpet and underlay back to prevent water damage. This gave me a clean place to kneel and stand!!
Her mother’s not much better in terms of social graces @Bathsheba. About 6 months ago I went round to put together one of those plastic sheds in her garden. Again, no-one to meet and greet, yet alone help or offer a cuppa. At the end of it, I got a “thanks” by text. I don’t expect payment, and I know they’re not wealthy. But manners are free.
Anyway, as asked in my op,…anyone else had any similarish experiences?
The closest I came to anything like that was in my last job, it was in Harrogate of all places, a very wealthy area, I’d been sent to clean the ducting on a couple of dryers at a sheltered housing place, the room itself had the bulb missing, ( folk used to sleep in there so it was removed by some enterprising person) , the caretaker advised me not to go behind the dryers as there could be used needles, I asked if I could go out on the flat roof area and get them from outside, he said that would be worse as there was dog and human excrement out there, needless to say I refused to do the job, thankfully I never went back although, trying to explain that simply fitting a new lightbulb to the young girl in our office was not an option,
@Primus1 , only been to Harrogate once (BBC good food show few years back, plus afternoon tea in the famous cake shop). Lovely place and obviously affluent. But I digress.
I genuinely don’t understand how some people can live in filth and squalor, yet alone expect others to have to put up with it.
I feel sorry for your daughter Dex! This friend lay in bed whilst your daughter & her kind father went to help prepare a room, presumably for decorating.
I am sure she was embarrassed at dog poo on the floor and the fact that her friend hadn’t even bothered to get up and express her thanks for what you did.
If I had taken my father to a situation like this, I would have been ashamed that my father witnessed how my friend lived & behaved.
Ah, well they have to choose their own friends of course and learn by experience
But it sounds to me as if that particular friend is a “user” maybe a bit of a bully?
If your mate and her dad were coming round to do you a favour you’d make sure you were up to show them where stuff is, make them a cup of tea and a bacon butty and thank them properly, if you had any respect for your mate
But this one doesn’t, and why is your daughter prepared to pick up dog mess for her?
You can’t criticise her friend, of course, you’ll only make your daughter defensive. But you might need to give her a bit of support to make good choices in the future about this “friendship” which doesn’t sound like a very equal or healthy one to me.
Not here. I wouldn’t offer to help someone who would make the task so difficult. If I got there and it looked like the person didn’t care I’d probably leave.
Edit: I’m assuming you’re asking anyone who might do a task for someone else. I don’t have tradesperson’s skills.
As you doing a favour and good deed for a friend I would of expected the owner to be up ready with the tea and biscuits.
The room cleared as far as possible ready for action . I would help with moving heavy items but cleaning unmentionables that’s a no.no or even finding one
Both angles really. Stories from those who have done work for others, plus from those who think I’m making a bit of a fuss about nothing and its perfectly fine to expect tradesfolk to deal with the mess as part of the job
Personally, I don’t think “ shaming “ her will help,imo, she could well be depressed ,Dex…maybe your daughter can shed some light onto it, …why is she still in bed as well.plus letting the puppy poo everywhere…I think there’s a lot more to it.
Edit to add, I remember a church friend many years ago, who was extremely depressed, she let everything go, including her own personal hygiene, plus she was in bed a lot…I’ve also taken to my bed many years ago with depression…depression is a terrible thing…I’m not saying she has it…just my thoughts.
