Hi
Small talk is a skill that some have naturally and others have to learn.
I personally think that it’s polite to make the effort and try to find out what they are interested in and talk about that.
As regards what do you do for a living it depends on who is at the function and if it is a legitimate question and how senior they are.
Most of the time I am a very boring man in a suit Public Servant.
You have to be careful though .
Once at a dinner with a load of Australians I innocently asked my neighbour what were his roots ie was he an Australian through several generations .
Some wag shouted he can only remember last weeks .
I had no idea what they were laughing about .( then)
@Muddy , ," you can always tell an SAS man"
Oh, you know a few do you ??
OK, l will give you that the woman was dreadful !!
But the Pratt did have a sense of humour !! 
What you on,Donkey man?..
Personally, I have asked people too many questions and got severely told off for it…it never stopped me asking questions though,
Seriously, I’m very careful “ now” what questions I ask…I guess, because I don’t mind what people ask me about myself, I think everyone was like that…but they aren’t,
You have your own humour,DM, I’ve gotten to know it over the years…you engage before you think…
Only joking, I fink you are luverly…in short doses!..
What? In what context? Sniff the person before you chat? Sniff the food on offer? what exactly do you sniff? 
No sniffing around here!!..
Imo, it’s just his humour, it’s off the wall…
Muddy I would have replied
" Really, whatever made you attend this lunch then?"
People who only want to talk about themselves are insular, so not often good company. I tend to talk to the people who want to chat in circumstances like that. Perhaps the insular ones will learn if people listen to what they say but still ask them questions.
Sadly, not everybody is comfortable talking to people they don’t know, but maybe they need to be encouraged!
Aye, it is just a bit. I’m trying to imagine a fairly posh afternoon tea or something, and there’s an older gentleman wandering around sniffing all the people deciding which one smells nice enough to engage in conversation with. Gives me a little chuckle. (even if it is a tad creepy!)
Well unless you are in charge of M16 it’s easy enough to say I’m an engineer / dustman / accountant /
It’s only small talk no one wants to know the ins and outs unless you are a test pilot or something .
Test pilots don’t mind talking about their work .
I have lived in two countries where the SAS did training .
In a country where everyone else is small , dark and speak another language SAS men stick out like sore thumbs and they know it .
Hi
I would have great difficulty pretending to be an engineer or accountant.
I was basically a well paid cleaner up and scapegoat.
Once I went inadvertently to a lecture that was really meant for doctors .
I kept very quiet and tried to look like a doctor someone asked me what my speciality’ was !
I said just er general and made my escape as soon as possible !
Some people don’t like being asked what they do, I don’t myself because, well, it not a job that makes you popular in a lot of circles:rofl: So I just reply with something generic
You SAS bloke might have been the same, or just doesn’t like discussing his life with strangers? Sounds like he might be a bit of a plonker or trying to be clever though
I’d just have teased back, something like “I bet I can get it out of you by the end of the evening, Mr Bond” or “You’re carrying a weapon, aren’t you, I can tell by the way you walk!”
Sounds like the woman was a bit of an attention seeker, real introverts don’t feel the need to announce it and draw attention to themselves.
And of course, once she’d said it, it gave her and excuse not to take an interest in anyone else and be centre stage
I think the bouncing ball analogy is still the best guide to conversation
One person has the ball and throws it to someone else, who catches it and throws it back, or onto the next person
You all try to make sure that everyone in the group get a turn with the ball, because while it’s OK for two people to exchange throws and catches between themselves for a short while, if they don’t then throw it to the others, it’s boring for the others. Get a room and your own ball!
It’s OK for one person to keep the ball for a couple of minutes to do a bit of entertaining fancy juggling, but if they keep hogging it for too long, everyone else gets bored
You don’t throw the ball too hard, or make it too difficult to catch and you recognise peoples different abilities in ball catching and throwing and adjust your own throwing and catching accordingly
You encourage the nervous to join in with gentle, easy passes and grab the ball from the too greedy or boisterous to make them pass it on ……. and intercept if a bully is repeatedly throwing it at the same persons head!
And never, ever cover the ball in bile!
