…no 
…
Surely you’re not waiting for more ?
Moi?..
Anyone !!! 
Yes, I know the wait is hard but hang on in there I WILL write another uber poem soon 
.
…promises promises :roll:
Watching Crap
Oh, I have watched some crap today
Not gotta TV license - not enough pay
Sos I keep looking at the same old stuff
Same old rubbish makes viewing tough
Then again I have found full length films on YouTube now
I can even download them and watch them any old how
At my leisure with my feet up all comfy, though my slippers are rather worn
But I make up for it with bowl after bowl of luvly popcorn
Just watched a very old film about a mining disaster
Dust and more dust and dirt and off colour matter
Reminded me of how life was at one time in Wales
Though many miners are gone now - houses up for sale
And towns demoralised, standing all forlorn
Such is progress - life though does carry on (orn)
So is there a moral to this tale?
Don’t fink so just me being a male
And arsing about to fill in time
Like many males do - which is fine
…
Crap lol…
ouch !
You’ve hit the nail on the head with the new offering Mark, “Watching Crap” It so aptly describes the Nations disgust with the TV channels, I would go as far as to say it could be used as a valuable piece of evidence in favour of the defense in a court case for non payment of a TV license, well done me boy!
Writer’s Block
So what is today’s poem going to be about?
Mmm let me think - what is in me ed that has some clout?
Can’t really pinpoint anything at all
Has me ed suddenly shrunk so small?
Nah must be a passing thing - a writer’s block
I mean most famous writers feel like hitting their heads against a rock (read real fast)
At times to get the old grey matter working again
I just need to relax a bit, not all just me brain
Hey I just had this profound thought
I not got writer’s block, not a ed full of nought
Cos I writing this so eloquently
Sos that means I writing stuff don’t you see!
Ah I not as afflicted after all
Me ed ain’t suddenly shrunk so small
No me brains are still very much intact
Lets face it this poem is evidence - fact
That I can write at will on any subject I choose
It is sooooo obvious - I just can’t lose
Whoaa - sublime
Cos I writing this so eloquently
Sos that means I writing stuff don’t you see!..
…'and it’s better than watching crap on TV ’ 
Absolutely 
.
Supportive Phone Call
Just talked to my girlie on the phone
I could hear her voice - it doesn’t drone
She was on about her many life’s problems
Should I be concerned about them (s)?
Well yes I should lend a helping hand
Failing that I could possibly do something grand
That will help lift her spirits and put a smile on her face
I am good at that - I have lots of grace
Sos I talks about this and that
Sometimes about her cat (s)
But always conscious of not appearing to be a twat
Or I could well end up being treated as a door mat
I really tried my best to get her mood to lighten up
Pulled all the stops out cos I am a genuinely caring chup
And indeed by the end of our call she was all aglow
I had done my job so it was time to go
Uber .
Update: she said it didn’t work 
.
Update: she said it didn’t work .
All I can say if that didn’t melt her heart, a blowtorch wouldn’t.
Yes. Wasted another 5 mins of my life again 
.
A Homage to Tomato Sauce
Tomato sauce in a plastic bottle
I eat loads and not just a little
I squirts it on lots of things but not everything mind you
Don’t think I have yet added it to a stew
But it would be quite easy to do
Me and food - not gotta clue
Sos there I am with this big plastic bottle of gunk
I bet you are wondering how low I have sunk
To want to spread this stuff all over food so
Even simple things end up with a reddish glow
My latest combo will probably make you sick
Cos I combine popcorn with it - quite a trick
Does end up all gooey and stuck together in lumps
Certainly not for non popcorn eating chumps
So there you have my little tomato sauce story
You can get big bottles of it from Tesco’s in all it’s glory
Splash it on willy nilly just like aftersave - like Brut in fact
And the inside of your belly with def thank you for that
Don’t you dare rush out and buy too much in one go
And leave me with none on my shelves to show
That would be unfair of you on this particular day
I needs my tomato sauce fix come what may
Bet I have turned you all in to tomato sauce addicts now eh :-D?
That poem is simply appetising .
[/B]
aww bless, at least you tried
What a talent you have discovered Mark, who would have guessed that it has been lying dormant all these years 
Could it be that you are more content with life these days?