Tonight I think I might Dream
That my torso was covered in cream
A real messy thought
But the cream I still bought
And enjoyed it, yer know what I mean?
Later I had a hot bath
Later I had a hot bath
As my neighbour came up the path
Later I had a hot bath
As my neighbour came up the path
She peeped through my window
Later I had a hot bath
As my neighbour came up the path
She peeped through my window
And asked me to play Bingo
Later I had a hot bath
As my neighbour came up the path
She peeped through my window
And asked me to play Bingo
I said “You wot? You’re ‘avin’ a laugh”
I went to the dog track instead
I went to the dog track instead
I must have been out of me 'ead
I went to the dog track instead
I must have been out of me 'ead
For I lost loads of cash
I went to the dog track instead
I must have been out of me 'ead
For I lost loads of cash
For being too rash
I went to the dog track instead
I must have out of me 'ead
For I lost loads of cash
For being too rash
So I went home and sulked in me bed.
The next day I thought I might go
The next day I thought I might go
To try my luck in the casino
The next day I thought I might go
To try my luck in the casino
But the croupier cheated
The next day I thought I might go
To try my luck in the casino
But the croupier cheated
And, then repeated,
The next day I thought I might go
To try my luck in the casino
But the croupier cheated
And, then repeated,
“Place your bet or pick a row”
Pockets full of cash, I ambled on
Pockets full of cash I wandered on
Looking to spend the loot that i’d won
Pockets full of cash I wandered on
Looking to spend the loot that i’d won
But I soon lost it all
Pockets full of cash I wandered on
Looking to spend the loot that i’d won
But I soon lost it all
So home I did trawl
Pockets full of cash I wandered on
Looking to spend the loot that i’d won
But I soon lost it all
So home I did trawl
And retired to bed with a yawn
Some bailiffs arrived at my door
Some bailiffs arrived at my door
Explained I must pay up the score
Some bailiffs arrived at my door
Explained I must pay up the score
Quick out the window I went