In the dunes Fred saw some little Terns
While lurking he got a few burns
From the prickly marram grass
As he tried to pass
In the dunes Fred saw some little Terns
While lurking he got a few burns
From the prickly marram grass
As he tried to pass
Oh dear, poor old Fred never learns.
One day Fred went into town
One day Fred went into town
But something he saw made him frown
One day Fred went into town
But something he saw made him frown
It was someone spitting in the street
One day Fred went into town
But something he saw made him frown
It was someone spitting in the street
Just inches in front of his feet
One day Fred went into town
But something he saw made him frown
It was someone spitting in the street
Just inches in front of his feet
And it went all over his gown. 
Fed up with this one, can we have a change?
The parrot said to the cat
The parrot said to the cat
You eat too much, you’re getting fat
The parrot said to the cat
You eat too much, you’re getting fat[
The cat sucked in his belly
The parrot said to the cat
You eat too much, you’re getting fat[
The cat sucked in his belly
Then phoned up the deli
The parrot said to the cat
You eat too much, you’re getting fat
The cat sucked in his belly
Then phoned up the deli
And ordered an extra big sprat.
In the cafe sat a lady called Flo
In the cafe sat a lady called Flo
Who was partial to giving her lawn a good mow
In the cafe sat a lady called Flo
Who was partial to giving her lawn a good mow
She liked to make stripes
In the cafe sat a lady called Flo
Who was partial to giving her lawn a good mow
She liked to make stripes
By using wet wipes
In the cafe sat a lady called Flo
Who was partial to giving her lawn a good mow
She liked to make stripes
By using wet wipes
But it never worked properly you know.
So she went into town for a coffee
And a big fat wedge of Banoffee
So she went into town for a coffee
And a big fat wedge of Banoffee
She couldn’t move from her seat
So she went into town for a coffee
And a big fat wedge of Banoffee
She couldn’t move from her seat
She admitted defeat
So she went into town for a coffee
And a big fat wedge of Banoffee
She couldn’t move from her seat
She admitted defeat
And treated herself to a bag of toffee.
The toffees were sticky but nice
The toffees were sticky but nice
But were a terribly high price
The toffees were sticky but nice
But were a terrible price
So she went for a Yorkie
The toffees were sticky but nice
But were a terrible price
So she went for a Yorkie
And that made her Porky