Jem I wonder if you like these.
They are obviously new to me but I did enjoy that tune, very talented pair.
Tell Phylis, I will introduce you to more stuff on the country scene.
I’ll tell her when she wakes up, she’s asleep now on the sofa beside me and a bomb wouldn’t wake her at the moment.
Whenever I asked my old Granny what as the best cure for anything she always cheekily answered “Keep it till it gets better” Maybe she had a point there, she was a great believer in suffering in silence, as were most women back then, very few like that today.;-)
Here’s one for my old friend Gerry Higginbottom rest his soul, a moaner of the highest order when he was alive.
On Higgin’s bottom a boil did dwell
It made his cheek red and it pained him as well
It wasn’t very often that he got ‘em
He had two on his neck before, but never his bottom.
An office worker on moderate pay
Well he did sit on his arse all day
He phoned in to say he wasn’t coming
Sat on one cheek, and was comforted by his woman.
That night the pain was really severe
So a poultice he made on his bum to adhere
Off he went to lie down on his bed
Hoping in the morning it would come to a head.
But he was stuck with it for the whole week
Always turning the other cheek
Nothing lasts forever we are told
And soon Higginsbottom was back in the fold.
Jem that shed at the bottom of ya garden must be in a real clutter??
A teacher fell asleep in class and a little naughty boy walked up to him,
Little boy: ;teacher are you sleeping in class?;
Teacher: ;No I am not sleeping in class.;
Little boy: ;What were you doing sir?;
Teacher: ;I was talking to God.;
The next day the naughty boy fell asleep in class and the same teacher walks up to him.
Teacher: ;young man, you are sleeping in my class.;
Little boy: ;No, not me sir, I am not sleeping.;
Angry teacher: ;What were you doing?;
Little boy: ;I was talking to God.;
Angry teacher: ;What did he say?;
Little boy: ;God said he never spoke to you yesterday.;
smart arse heh??
Got to keep up with you guys.
sorry meant the boy NOT you - I’ve never seen ya arse!!
Cheeky boy:mrgreen:
I knew what you meant:-p
I’m saying Goodnight to you here now.
I am doing my rounds of Good Night.
Recycling is big business, and I missed the boat on this one, but, that’s not my fault. Back in 75, my careers advisor said, where do you see yourself in 40 years time, I said “Recycling”, he said “Spitty, stop talking Rubbish”.
I’m sure you would have done well Spitty, with a picture of Grata Garbage hanging in your office and all those workers at your disposal., where there’s muck there’s brass.
I met an old friend on the way back from the shops earlier, he started work as a boy in the seventies in Dublin Zoo, I hadn’t seen him in years and I asked him was he working away “No Jem, I’m still in the Zoo”:shock:
For some reason it struck me as a strange kind of an answer if you know what I mean, it did not specify if he was an exhibit or a worker, or he could be saying that he was not working away, he was working in Dublin, ah forget it.
Jem that was a very witty post.
Zoo’s - Mmmm thinking:confused:…
I used to drive Subaru’s in the past, I like fast cars.
My old Dad, God rest his soul, never pronounced anything correctly, he used to say to me, “Let’s get the Zooboo on the road”.
Ah,the MkII Land Rover,88" SWB,with the Fairey Overdrive and a hard top,has e’er been my favourite trundle-buggy,Sweaty Pie.
Amazingly nimble…I can do 0-50 in a mere three days,can contain tourist traffic in an orderly manner behind me on the sweeping country lanes,can zip through floods without pause or worry,have no fear of oil spills or detritus on the road…and the BEST bit…can leave it unlocked,or the windows open when shopping,as no bugger wants to steal it!
SWEATY??? Do I stink or summink???
Nowt wrong with Land Rollovers:-D
Can’t beat a good old clapped out model for reliabilty. Third class riding beats first class walking any day. Just saying :-D:-D:-D
Oh,scoff if you wish…but just yesterday,I overtook the vicar!
Admittedly he was on his bicycle…and going uphill…with full shopping-bags on both handlebars…but thattaintthepoint! The point is,it took me just Arfur Mile,to zoom effortlessy[ish] past him! So muhhh.
Holy cassocks. Speeding past the vicar is very dodgy as they have the Almighty on their side but as he only had shopping bags and no proper basket you will be forgiven this once.
Proper vicars with proper bike baskets are worth 10 points
…btw - don’t be self-conscious,Sweaty Pie…after all,armpits are SUPPOSED to be damp. That’s why you have those massive tufts of hair,y’see;and I see you’re proud of yours in a most unusual ‘fashion statement’ way.
…it’s not every day one sees a lady with plaited armpit hair…
[I shall now run and hide]