that’s just perverted pleasure!
would she still have her footy gloves on at that point??
Only if she was determined to stop your balls getting into her net,gumbuddy. But Jem has a point…whatever happened to elegance being a valid quality to the Y-chromosome gang?
Today,it seems they all want to be olympic boxers,dustcart drivers,on-site carpenters or ‘fire fighters’ [as opposed to ‘firemen’]. Ohhh,to find a truly elegant,sweetly demure,softly persuasive feminine lady…especially one who appreciates being treated as a lady,rather than being offended by a bloke having the temerity to hold a door open for her. [btw gumbuddy…you dance divinely,poppet.]
yes I did enjoy our dance at the candy bar the other night but the other guys were giving us strange looks don’t you think honeybun?
I was only clutching your arse for support as I was unable to find an erect position alone - and the absinthe on your breathe was divine:blush:
Good on ya Gummy!
The Candybar Waltz.
I was dancin’ with my darlin to the Candybar Waltz
When an old friend I happened to see.
I introduced him to my darlin’ and while they were dancin’
My friend stole my sweetheart from me.
I remember the night and the Candybar Waltz
Now I know just how much I have lost
Yes, I lost my little darlin’ the night they were playin’
That beautiful Candybar Waltz
Now I wonder how a dance like the Candybar Waltz
Could have broken my heart so complete
Well I couldn’t blame my darlin’, and who could help fallin’
In love with my darlin’ so sweet.:-)
I’m up unusually early this morning as I have an appointment with the dentist at 10am to have a back tooth out, it’s been nagging me for a week now so it’s time to get rid of it.
There goes that ad again.
“You are a true friend of the Court” Dilly dilly
“And what have you brought Sir Walter?”
“I have something for the Queen Sire, something she loves”
Willy willy!
The Queen a lady of some renown
I think her name was Gilly
She hoisted up her bustle
Flashed her hosen, Frilly Thrilly.
Good one Spitty.
“You are a true friend of the Court” Dilly dilly
“And what have you brought Vincent O’Brien?
“I have brought a two year old female racehorse”
Filly filly!
Oh woe is me
I got a hole in me mouth, where a tooth used to be
I was put in a chair
In pain, suffering to the point of despair
The dentist gave a short inspection
Then opened me mouth and gave me an injection
He pulled and yanked for quite a while
Held up the molar and gave me a smile
“Of that monster you are finally rid
I’m afraid that’ll cost you eighty quid.
And he’s the wife’s nephew, just wait till he want’s his ring sized, still cheap enough to be shut of the thing once and for all.
Well hello everyone.
It has come to my attention, that 5G is being pioneered in Bournemouth.
This will bring many small masts to the town. The continued problem with this, is infrastructure! But, as autonomous vehicles, are being made and indeed are the supposedly the future, I can only reflect on the song, In the year 2525!
I have visions of Bournemouth and Poole, becoming one. As cities are often formed.
Talking about the future, some professor was on BBC 4 the other night and he figured out that in 8.5 billion years time two giant galaxies will collide causing a beautiful fireworks type display in the sky, handy to know that ain’t it, might even stay up to watch it.
So I wouldn’t worry about the future Sweetie, what will be will be, besides according to the way his mind is thinking 2525 is only tomorrow.
And he’s the wife’s nephew, just wait till he want’s his ring sized, still cheap enough to be shut of the thing once and for all.
there’s a few guys around here who would do that for him for pleasure - right lads?
Not in this Court.
Dilly dilly.
Goodnight Possums.
If tomorrow never comes, at least I said sweetie Dreams.
in ya dreams lads - form a queue - only pugsie wugsie is allowed to walk to the front of it! he’s so demanding and tangos deliriously - if you haven’t seen his fandango you are missing out but it only performs at a full moon!
…I’m miffed. You forwent the pleasure of mentioning my huge erection,gumbuddy!
…and I erected that marquee with NO assistance,y’know!
Still-the pleasure of seeing you in your tight-fitting toreador’s kit as you twirled around me was worth the effort!
OLE’!
Bring me your ring dilly dilly
Show me your ring
You want it enlarging dilly dilly
Oh you brave silly thing
Calling on Pugs dilly dilly
He’ll stretcheth ya ring
And you will go to the ball dilly dilly
With a new fitting ring
You wanted our Jem dilly dilly
You wanted our Jem?
Well he’s working like fury dilly dilly
He only does the real men!
But don’t worry yourself dilly dilly
He’s taught Pugs all he knows
So if he spoileth ya ring dilly dilly
All hell let loose he will knows!!
…I’m miffed. You forwent the pleasure of mentioning my huge erection,gumbuddy!
well erhm - I didn’t want to push it too hard??
You UTTER cad! Why,just a few hours ago you were whispering in my ear,saying how excited seeing my huge erection had made you…AND you even had the temerity to ask if you could stroke my guy-post…you RAT!
You’re a really slippery fellow,gumbuddy.
So slippery you remind me of phlegm.
You also have dual personalities,young man.
It’s the truth that I hate BOTH of them!
[minces off head in air,determined not to cry…#sob#…]
Thinking of the future I recall reading in the bible something about the ‘last day’, methinks that professor chap nicked his galaxy theory from the bible, get a load of this from Peter, a simple fisherman who never saw a school day in his life. Eric Van Danikin had some good theories but they branded him a fraud. Anyway here’s what Peter says and he got it from the horses mouth so to speak.
2 Peter 3:10-13
“But the day of the Lord will come like a thief, and then the heavens will pass away with a roar, and the heavenly bodies will be burned up and dissolved, and the earth and the works that are done on it will be exposed. Since all these things are thus to be dissolved, what sort of people ought you to be in lives of holiness and godliness, waiting for and hastening the coming of the day of God, because of which the heavens will be set on fire and dissolved, and the heavenly bodies will melt as they burn! But according to his promise we are waiting for new heavens and a new earth in which righteousness dwells”
Pretty strong stuff eh? Maybe they knew more than we credit them for back then.:shock:
My dear old mother used to say to me on Monday mornings “Jem, it’s time for work, the Lord himself couldn’t rise you even if it was on the last day”
Bless her soul she never let me be late for work.
thinkin of the future at your age Jem - for fecks sake - look back on the past and enjoy - remember Lenoard Cohens - the future - play it in C spittie!
Give me back my broken night
My mirrored room, my secret life
It’s lonely here
There’s no one left to torture
Give me absolute control
Over every living soul
And lie beside me, baby
That’s an order!
Give me crack and anal sex
Take the only tree that’s left
And stuff it up the hole
In your culture
Give me back the Berlin wall
Give me Stalin and St. Paul
I’ve seen the future, brother
It is murder
Things are going to slide (slide) in all directions
Won’t be nothing (won’t be)
Nothing you can measure anymore
The blizzard, the blizzard of the world
Has crossed the threshold
And it has overturned
The order of the soul
When they said (they said) repent (repent), repent (repent)
I wonder what they meant
When they said (they said) repent (repent), repent (repent)
I wonder what they meant
When they said (they said) repent (repent), repent (repent)
I wonder what they meant
You don’t know me from the wind
You never will, you never did
I’m the little Jew
Who wrote the Bible
I’ve seen the nations rise and fall
I’ve heard their stories, heard them all
But love’s the only engine
Of survival
Your servant here, he has been told
To say it clear, to say it cold
It’s over, it ain’t going any further
And now the wheels of heaven stop
You feel the devil’s riding crop
Get ready for the future: It is murder
Things are going to slide (slide) in all directions
Won’t be nothing (won’t be)
Nothing you can measure anymore
The blizzard, the blizzard of the world
Has crossed the threshold
And it has overturned the order of the soul
and if you wish the dvd!
don’t forget the forward slash Jem - it stops you wetting ya shoes!!