I watched the MASH series on and off for many years. Luckily we had the UK version, except one episode where the American version was inadvertently transmitted, complete with canned laughter.
There were so many complaints about it, that it never happened again.
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Orchids are expensive,
Will dandelions do?
Hello Possums
Can’t stop.
For MASH get SMASH:mrgreen:
Poppies are red,
Carrnations are white
Rosemary forget to bring some
I said “so that’s alright”!
blossom’s just blossomed
bluebells just blew
daisy’s were dainty
how about you??
I once knew a mechanic called Max, he was a German lad and he opened a garage specialising in fixing crashed cars, he had a big sign over the garage door “For Max get smashed”
I used to get a good laugh watching MASH Gummy, some great characters in the series.
These days I can’t watch anything about wars or military, don’t know what it is but I just got a turn against them all including war films I used to like, watched the Guns of Navarone a while ago, but Maclean’s works are more of a who done it than mass slaughter, maybe it’s an age thing.
Ah,Jem…you old fart,you!¬
The thing to remember,Jembo,is that this weird,unique,never-copied lifeform known as ‘Homo Erectus’ [shuddup gummy] has been savage from day one. I mean,whacking the hell out of a yummysaurus,then dragging it back to Mrs Ugg,doing their poor anthropoidal backs in on the way,meant one day Ugg was sat idly bashing a rock,when his mate from the next-cave-but-one pootled up and asked what he was doing. Ugg showed him the rock he’d been bashing…it was now a disc,having been bashed and whacked for two hours non-stop [Ugg had lost yet another argument with Herself,that morning]…and Ogg looked at the disc,thought for a moment,then set about knocking a stave through the centre! Yes—the REAL genius was the one who invented the AXLE! For now,Ugg could pile munchysauroses AND not-yet-quite-got-the-hang-of-flightodactyles in his wheelbarrow,then he and Ogg could take turns pushing and swearing as they realised they lived up a hill! SEE? Because…
Pansies like to get moist,then be well drained,[grrr!]
Tulips of pink say ‘affection’ [well explained]
Petunias,hmm,they can be contradictory,
Roses of pink;well,they tell the whole story.
But any flowers,once given,are romancing steps gained,
…which explains why you’re dick’s sore and your pelvis is strained.
thassa a luv pome by Puggy…betcha all goin’ “Awww” and recalling past events…
Awwwwww but maybe not for the same reasons 
Here is a language, little known,
Lovers claim it as their own.
Its symbols smile upon the land,
Wrought by nature’s wondrous hand;
And in their silent beauty speak,
Of life and joy, to those who seek
For Love Divine and sunny hours
In the language of the flowers.
The Language of Flowers, London, 1875
How true that is Pug, there ain’t a lot you can do with a lone bare wheel, the axil is what makes it all happen.
You were talking about love earlier, I often wondered how poor Dennis up in the local got his stiff leg, his story was that he was working on a building site and a badly laid block fell from a height and flattened it, I believed him for decades, but recently I heard a different version.
The wife is a great friend of his wife’s and she was telling Phyllis that it was actually a sex game that went badly wrong, of course she would not divulge a word until the wife was sworn in to secrecy, the usual ritual with two old hens when they are about to condemn some poor unfortunate, then it all flowed out as if it was a demon she was trying to get off her chest for years.
Believe me this is the shortest possible version I can do, it took the wife nearly an hour to tell me the story, what with her rambling off course and imaginative suggestions, I had to use all my skill and judgement to sort the wheat from the chaff.;-)
It seems when herself and Dennis were only a few years married they lived in a rented room over a tobacconist shop, old Mrs Gilligan and her husband Jack had the little room behind the shop and were sound asleep one night, they were wakened by a loud crash on the ceiling. The pair of them went upstairs to see what had happened, the door was locked but they could hear Dennis moaning in agony and his wife screaming “Help! get me out of here” Mrs Gilligan used her spare key to open the door and there was yerman in his pelt lying on the floor with one leg sticking out and the wardrobe on top of him, you couldn’t see his wife as she was still in the wardrobe. Whatever they were at it sent the wardrobe flying forward on it’s face. The old man and his missus tried in vain to lift the wardrobe off Dennis, but it was one of those old fashioned mahogany jobs, weighing a ton and built with permanence in mind, plus the woman inside it was the opposite to Twiggy, they had to phone the fire brigade.
When the fire brigade arrived a fair sized crowd from the closing boozer next door had gathered outside the shop, Dennis was covered with a blanket on the stretcher as two grinning firemen placed him in the ambulance, then came his missus, again covered with a bigger blanket and a scarf more over her face than her head.
Whatever happened in that wardrobe that fateful night we’ll never know for sure, but something snapped in Dennis’s spine that left him with a stiff leg for life.
Best to stick to the conventional stuff I say.
Avin bin sworn to secrecy on a similar high spirited episode involving handcuffs and a thunder flash, we can only be thankful that there was a scarf handy in both our tales Jem.
Is that where the expression cupboard love comes from?
Just a thought here. She could have been looking for Narnia.
I survived, the Four Sprung Duck Technique, but, ended up “spitting” feathers.
Y’know,I still have my original issued handcuffs,from my time in uniform.
They were replaced by keyless ones,so my original set were suddenly redundant.
Hmm;could’ve sworn I handed then in at our base…silly moi.
ANYWAY…iff’n y’want t’borrow them,solo?..
[Just sayin’,like. No pressure…]
Are they fluffy pink ones Pugsy Bear?
My DARLING Cutiebear…
…you DO realise,that if this lot find out about us [and how you like me to handcuff your ankles to the bedposts,then make you giggle with my tickling stick] that we’ll have to let them see our videos? HMMM? …and then how can you EVER face Mother Superior again,knowing it was HER knickers you saw hanging from the lightshade in my bedroom? HMMM? … [the M&S label gave her away]. BLOODY good job she didn’t get her knickers from C&A,what? [smirk] However,Cutie & I are ‘just good frenz’. OK?!?
oh thank goodness solo you managed to lift the conversation back up a few notches. [if he lives on a island can’t we set him adrift?]
I’m still tryin to figure out how you watch MASH with an english dialogue - god forbid the irish balarny - that would be impossible!
and I always thought your name came from the planes - but you been a feather man all along! [the planes in spain fly mainly on the plains?]
now seeing you with ya jackhammer shimmering and you spitting feathers would be a sight for sore necks!!
Have received delivery
Of many a Noun
Underneath
The Eiderdown.
pick the right one: cup; banana ; cock; feather duster; fart; french letter; glycerine tube; etc etc
