cut to the quick or is that a cut in time saves nine?
While attending a Marriage Guidance Weekend Ken and his wife, Janet, listened to the instructor declare, ‘it is essential that husbands and wives know the things that are important to each other.’
He then addressed the men, ‘Can you name and describe your wife’s favourite flower?’
Ken leaned over, touched Janet’s arm gently, and whispered,
“Homepride Self Raising, isn’t it?”
And thus began Ken’s life of celibacy
Not all Female bakers are wholesome, I knew one, she was a Batch.
really did she rise to the occasion?
Whatever happened to “The Man in the Street”? Nobody seems to consult him anymore, has he emigrated? The man in the streets input is sadly missed these days, and funny enough there didn’t seem to as much chaos about when he kept his watchful eye on things.
I’m going to try to do my bit for the return of the man in the street.
“Accumulation of knowledge can be dangerous to your health and well being” According to Mickey O’ Toole that is, a happy bin man from Dublin. Why Mickey O’Toole you may well ask? Why not I’ll say, why should only professors and so called experts be quoted? It’s time the man in the street had his say again and Mickey is literally a man in the street doing his job of work.
“The way I see it is this, some people have a craving for knowledge, an intense desire to try to understand everything, how does this and that work, and why are we here, where do we go when we die, where were we before we were born, how many stars are there in the sky, exactly how old is this earth, and so on. I think this is very bad for the brain, it confuses it, information overloading will burst the tiny electrons and cause ‘freezing’ of the brain, resulting in panic attacks and violent outbursts.
I’m glad to say I was never like that, just enough knowledge to make a living and get by was always good enough for me, I don’t care how many stars are in the sky or how quantum physics works, What’s the point of learning all this stuff if it all goes to waste when you die? I mean you can’t donate your brain no matter how much crap it has gathered over the years, it’s just another piece of shit and rots away with the rest of you, maybe it’s just as well, you’re better off enjoying yourself every chance you get and to hell with higher learning, life’s too short and you’ll live longer and worry less the less you know, remember the old saying “What the eye doesn’t see the heart doesn’t grieve for”
Einstein would have been happier digging ditches for a living, he would have looked fitter than the shrivelled up heap that he was, did you ever see a photo of him smiling? of course you didn’t, he was a miserable old git all his life, besides his theories are being proved wrong with each new generation of scientists that comes along, then these new ones will be proved wrong yet again by the next generation, it’s a vicious circle I tell you, one is better off knowing just what one needs to know, a clear brain is a happy brain if nothing else.
Have you noticed that since the advent of google every Joe Soap is an expert on everything? Yet they wouldn’t know how to hold a hammer properly if it was to save their lives, the essential basic skills are slowly disappearing, God help us when the real ‘big bang’ comes along, where will one stick the plug for one’s desktop? Don’t answer that, now if you’ll excuse me I have bins to empty”
Fair play to you Mickey!.:-)
Next week we’ll be in London getting ‘Man in the street’ Arthur Higgins views on junk food.
god Jem HAS taken a turn for the worst!! BUT you did strike a chord for me!
I have often pondered??? when me younger brother died 3 yrs ago I grieved and bemoaned his loss and still do. He was an accomplished guitarist going back eons; spoke fluent Spanish; drove over many kms in Spain; had a quick and wicked sense of humor and of course a vast collection of knowledge for past events which sometimes disagreed with mine!
all of that was lost when he passed away - if only we could have collected all his thoughts and memories on a collection of DVD’s for example so we could play them back in constant memory of him how comforting that would be. but as Jem has pointed out all of that just seeps away once we are in the grave or just a heap of ashes. doesn’t seem fair to me?
PS: ‘Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player, that struts and frets his hour upon the stage, and then is heard no more; it is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.’
(Macbeth Act 5, Scene 5)
an afterthought?
I have recently taken to watching A&E Biography of my favorite film stars on youtube - all free if you have unlimited access to the internet and high kilobytes. just finished Peter O’Toole who was an amazingly good actor IMO but also a very self-destructive man - now onto Jack Nicholson another of my favorite actors. so for them and their families their is a collective history of part of their lives and their crafts. the list is endless!
I watched a rare footage of Peter O ad Orsen Wells in B/W debating the nuances of Shakespeare and some of the characters and stories he wrote and they performed - Peter and Orsen admired each other and were equal to the challenge. but what impressed me was their knowledge of the shakespearian characters and the elizabethian history - they not only acted the parts but knew them intimately. these men were not just actors but accomplished professors of subjects!
See we can be serious sometimes! 
Yes, serious is just one nuance away, lets hope it is never digitised.
Who’s serious? not me, start taking life serious and your done for, it’s a mad world.
“You work and work for years and years
You’re always on the go
Never take a minute off
To busy makin’ dough
Some day, you say, you’ll have your fun
When you’re a millionaire
Imagine all the fun you’ll have
In your old rockin’ chair”
"Enjoy yourself it’s later than you think
Enjoy yourself while you’re still in the pink
The years go by as quickly as a wink
Enjoy yourself, enjoy yourself
It’s later than you think.
(Enjoy yourself, enjoy yourself it’s later than you think)
(Doris Day)
Rambled into town today to meet up with an old workmate of mine I hadn’t seen in a few decades, I got a shock. He had joined the trendy old men brigade, he who was a dedicated hippy and wouldn’t sleep in the same house where there was a collar and tie, Yet there he was sitting in front of me in a light blue suit complete with white shirt and screaming yellow tie, he was beaming his gnashers at the women in the lounge, teeth that were as white as the driven snow and as long and straight as the tombstones in Arlington Military Cemetery.
There’s nothing looks as corny and false on an old lad than brilliant white dentures, dyed rusty brown hair, and a doughnut coloured wrinkled head, Christ they stick out like sore thumbs everywhere in town during the Summer months, tourists mostly, who do they think they’re kiddin’.
Of course every old lad is entitled to dress and wear whatever they like, I’m merely pointing out what I think, far be it for me to try to stop anyone who wants to make an idiot of themselves, we’re all free mature men after all.
Grow old naturally and be what you are, warts an all, that’s what I think. There’s nothing as daft as an old man trying to be a young man again, every dog HAD his day.
It’s easy to get Tense, at the Past.
Quote Gumbud.
“all of that was lost when he passed away - if only we could have collected all his thoughts and memories on a collection of DVD’s for example so we could play them back in constant memory of him how comforting that would be”
It’s so sad when all that is lost forever and what was once a real live bubbly person becomes a photograph and a memory. Yes sickness and death are serious matters indeed and there’s no getting away from it, rich or poor, but I try to cross me bridges when I come to them, keep misery at arms length for as long as possible.
My dear mother had a real townie Dublin accent, she had a fantastic memory of when she was young growing up in the tenements, luckily my younger brother, who never married and was with her till the end of her life, taped a lot of her memories (unseen by her because if she knew she was on tape she’d put on her best telephone voice) before she got dementia. We all have copies of the tapes and when I play mine back Phyllis and me have a great laugh, my mother was a very good humoured woman and knew how to spin a funny yarn, God rest her soul.
nice one Jem!!
Yer see Jem, us dabbling oldies will be preserved digitally, for as long as it lasts, but perish the thought, some spotty faced upstart, with an IT degree, could change our input, and thus our personalities, posthumously.
Jem,you’re sounding somewhat dour,in your last few posts,old mate.
It’s not for the use,it’s for the understanding,that we seek knowledge,bruv.
Yes,I’m the nerd with the degrees,yes,I’m boring,with few friends and 3,000 books in my library,plus many more here in my home for reference reasons,plus many novels,all of which will be read and passed onto charity shops. No,I give not one hoot what people think of me-I learned many moons ago whilst still in uniform that what one person thinks is invaluable,the next person doesn’t give a ferk about. I’d suppose I AM that ‘knowledge for knowledge’s sake’ tiresome bore of which you speak so eloquently. Yes,any knowledge I attain,any discoveries I make…even any radical theories I devise,will be as snowflakes on a bonfire once I peg it.
But-to me,in MY life,that fascination with “What if” or “Why does”-or even “Just suppose for a moment…” is the axis around which I rotate.
I’m fully aware that most of the comments I get on this site are derogatory…or scathing…but,fukkem. YOU know more about jewels and gold than the rest of this site combined-YOU could make a gold ring,set with a beautifully cut emerald,in your shed…the rest of us MIGHT get a shelf up straight at the third attempt after hours of loudly expostulated expletives. So-what was the fascination that gave you such skills-and why did you bother,seeing as you’ll leave those skills,knowledge and understanding behind,when St Peter comes calling?
I agree that much of our advanced understanding and knowledge of things like quantum physics,sub-molecular phasic transmission,and macrocosmic observations of mass-clusters & their event horizons may WELL seem pointless…but,in it’s day,so did the idea of sucking a lime to ward off scurvy,or eating mould to cure infected wounds… how ridiculous-yet,stone the crows,it worked,after a little refinement and research. No,mate-we humans evolved to be inquisitive…after all,we share 99% of our dna with chimps. ook!
https://s13.postimg.org/s9k2toczb/179.jpg
ps…yes,he DID know how to smile.
[but he ALWAYS wore sensible footwear]
Jeepers Creepers, where did you get those Sneakers?
Jem, dear boy. What a wonderful legacy passed on to you.
My dad had a very detailed recall of events spanning his 80 years.
Did I write any of it down, for shame NO it has been lost.
on another site I visit there is a discussion about Celts of all thing - current research suggests that they no longer exist if they ever did well at least in Britain - just in the minds of those who think they are but cannot prove it by lineage; genomes or DNA mapping.
anyway to more serious discussions :
Paddy and Mick in a pickup truck drove into a lumberyard. Paddy walked in the office and said, “We need some four-by-twos.”
The clerk said, “You mean two-by-fours, don’t you?”
Paddy, “I’ll go ask Mick,” and went back to the truck. He returned a minute later and said, “Yeah, I meant two-by-fours.”
“All right. How long do you need them?”
Paddy paused for a minute and said, “I’d better go check.”
After a while, Paddy returned to the office and said, “A long time. We’re gonna build a house.”
I went to a Builders Merchant, but did not want to build a residence with timber, but, I was to shy to ask for the material I required, and ended up stum, and shaking at the counter. The assistant was very perceptive and said, don’t worry, I have seen this condition before, your are obviously “Bricking It”.
Dementia, is been around for ages, think back to the late 60s, early 70s, Batman had dementia, think about it, everything in the Bat Cave was labelled, although it was blatantly obvious what everything was, he must have had serious memory problems.
