My neighbour has been complaining that my dog has been barking non-stop. I hate the electric zapping bark collars, so I bought a humane citronella collar. When a dog barks, it shoots a blast of citronella under their nose and apparently, they don’t like it.
This morning I was getting the collar ready and filled it with the citronella liquid. And that’s where my morning should have ended. But no, me being me became curious as to “how” the collars actually work.
I stood at my back door “barking” at the dog’s collar but nothing happened . I made sure it’s turned on, checked the fill level, and went through the “getting started” check list one more time. Again, I bark. Nothing happened. Now I’m not quite sure, why I had this next thought, but I did…I put the collar on. I seriously extended the band and fitted the growl box against my throat and barked. Apparently, the collar only works if it feels vibrations, because I immediately received a blast of citronella to the face.
It made me cough, which only caused the collar to continue squirting the spray over and over up me flipping nose!. I ended up on my hands and knees in my garden, trying to breathe, and to make matters worse, the damn dog is barking. So, between coughing and telling him to shut up, I’ve emptied over a dozen blasts of citronella to my face. During all of this ruckus, I’m trying to undo the clasp of the collar, which has somehow managed to get wedged shut during this whole fiasco.
I finally got the collar off and threw, yes, I threw that INhumane thing across the garden, In the middle of thinking this is probably the most stupid thing I’ve done , I heard laughter. I was mortified MY NEIGHBOUR SAW THE WHOLE THING! He was laughing uncontrollably and could hardly breathe. Between gasps, he told me, “I was gonna come help, but every time I started to climb over the fence, you’d set it off again and then I would start laughing and couldn’t make it.” So now, not only are my eyes red, but my face and ears are too. After checking to make sure I was ok, we parted ways and I went in to shower coz I stank of the damn stuff!
Lesson learned: next time (yes, there will always be a next time with me) make sure that:
Don’t fill the collar before trying to set it off.
Remember your neighbour is not a good source of help in a comedy crisis situation.
On the plus side, I won’t have a mosquito problem for a few days!
Even though this could only be me doing this stupid thing , I hate to break the news that it’s a copied story that gave me a good laugh so feel free to do the same.
That reminds me of the time when next door’s dog was constantly yapping because they kept it locked up on a chain in their garden. On this particular occasion, it was keeping me awake as usual, so I got out of bed and got dressed. The missus asked me what I was doing, and I told her that I was going to sort that dog out once and for all. I was back a few minutes later with the dog still yapping away outside.
“What did you do?”, said the missus.
"I’ve put the bloody animal in OUR garden, let’s see how our neighbour likes being kept awake all night.
Poor LQ !
Ours isn’t generally a problem when we stroll but he can be a bit noisy when visitors come to our house - his domain. We use a spray bottle at him shut him up. It’s just plain water but it does the trick.
Im sorry you got blasted LQ , so now you know what you poor dog will go through and you might even finish up with a ill dog and Vet fees .
I would not use it for all the money in the world on my dog , A fim No when you are at home or Thats enough , will stop your dog from barking . I sometimes say Thank you ive heard you .
My BIL had a cat when he lived at home, it was a hot lazy summers day and next doors Alsatian would not stop barking, the cat, could take no more, it jumped over the fence, and, after much hissing and yelping it reappeared and continued to lay in the cool shade, the dog didn’t bark for the rest of the day……
Oh dear!
Maybe it happened for a good reason!
I hope your own discomfort at being sprayed with citronella has made you decide never to subject your dog to the same horrible experience ever again!
ETA - I think your last sentence maybe means this didn’t really happen to you - haha! You had me fooled!
This was a good laugh Queenie .
My son had trouble with a Tom Cat who kept attacking his little elderly cat causing her to need veterinary assistance .
So he rigged up this motion water system that would squirt anything that moved and it did everything except the Tom cat that is - .we all got soaked at one time or another .
In your original post you said ‘Poor LQ’, so I inferred that you thought the incident had really happened to her. But at the end, she says “I hate to break the news that it’s a copied story that gave me a good laugh so feel free to do the same.”
hahaha, sorry to the folks who thought I was serious. I saw it on fb and it really made me laugh so I wanted to give you guys a chuckle. Didn’t work for some but glad it gave some of you a good laugh!!!
Something we are lacking these days with all the doom and gloom that goes on.
Eliza I’m sorry if I upset you with my post, that wasn’t my intention
This made me laugh so much Bev…but I knew it wasn’t real as there is no way you would spray little Lokis face with lemon oil…or that John would allow it either…God I laughed though
