Moral dilemma!

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Only a mini one, but I opened my mouth and put my foot in it last week as usual and I think I’ve offended a friend :scream:

We both belong to craft club and go to a AgeUK tai chi class, unfortunately, they’re both on the same morning

Tai Chi is run by AgeUK. It’s £5 per session and you don’t pay if you don’t go. They pay £25 for the room, the teacher is a volunteer, so the rest of the money goes to AgeUK

There’s only room for 15 people and there’s a big waiting list

Craft club is free, with a donation box for materials and is also run by a volunteer with the local cafe giving us space free as long as we buy a coffee

Now, no one can be in two places at once, so what I do is go to craft club for half an hour, have a coffee and a chat and start the craft, then go to Tai Chi for my hour, and come back to craft club afterwards for half an hour to do a bit more craft, see what everyone has made and say goodbye (Both groups are in the same place)

It’s not ideal but I’ve got a lot of mates in the craft club and it’s nice to say hi and sometimes a few of us have lunch afterwards

My friend on the other hand alternates, going to Tai Chi one week and craft the next

Some one asked why I don’t do that too and I said I’d feel mean because it leaves an empty space in Tai Chi every other week and they lose out on £5 And there are people on the waiting list who’d love to do Tai Chi every week

Unfortunately I didn’t realise my friend was standing behind me and heard and now she’s miffed!

My old man says I’ll never learn to keep my trap shut and get off my high horse and I should say sorry to her because friendship is more important

What do you think?

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Staple your lips together , theres nothing worse then someone speaks before putting their brain in gear .

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I think you’re both right. You said why you do something, and that’s the truth. But you could apologize to your friend, letting her know you didn’t intend to hurt her feelings. You were just saying how you do things. That wasn’t meant to be a reflection on her.

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A true friend wouldn’t take umbridge Maree…

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I can’t see that you’ve done anything wrong that requires an apology.
I’d think the same way as you - I wouldn’t want to hog a place every week at the Tai Chi Class if I knew I was not going to attend half the classes.

If I thought my friend was miffed because she overheard my honest reply to someone else, I don’t think I’d apologise for my reasons but I’d probably reassure her that the reply she overheard was not about her and that I had just been explaining my reason for my own personal choice. I would tell her that I was not making any judgement or criticism of her choices and leave it at that.

Your friend overhearing your reply may end up being a blessing in disguise - it may make her think about whether it’s fair for her to hog a place in Class on a weekly basis then not use it.

Another idea would be to suggest that you and your friend “share” one place between you in the Tai Chi Class, so you attend on alternate weeks and free up the other place for someone on the Waiting List.

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I agree with OldGreyFox,but you could tell her you wasn`t being offencive and hoped you understood my reasoning.

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HaHa

:rofl:

woops, sorry Maree

:neutral_face: