RJ, I got a new one for you in the same vein as Kenneth Williams “Infamy, infamy, they’ve all got it infamy”
He’s just left the last guest out the front door after a big party, he’s knackered and goes to the fridge to get a cool beer, shock horror! “Empathy, empathy, they’ve left my fridge empathy!”
Do you think I’m on the wrong tablets?
Nothing amiss with fridges,Jem-they make ideal presents!
I know this is true…I got Yes Dear a new one for her birthday.
She was truly delighted…I could tell,cos when she opened it,her face lit up!
What is it with fridges that the doors always go wrong or break? I don’t know how many of the things we went through over the years, and they weren’t the cheap ones either, well not all of them.
Fairy tales.
The stuff kids come out with never ceases to amaze me. The youngest grand child has just turned four and today I was minding him for a few hours. He was playing with a Star Wars space ship he got for his birthday and he comes out with this question “Grandad can I go up to heaven in this rocket and if I don’t like it I can come back down to mammy and daddy?” I didn’t want to go there with him as I don’t know what his parents told him about heaven and hell, so I got out of it by saying that the rocket couldn’t carry enough fuel to get to heaven, it was too far away, that set him thinking for a while until he finally forgot about it, but I know he will be back with more of the same next time.
With religion getting kicked out the window in these modern times, out too go our old explanations for what happens when we die, a question the children always ask at some stage. There is now no heaven or hell so if we really want to be so scientific about everything and tell them nothing but the truth, why don’t we go the whole hog and tell them “When you die dear child, you cease to be, you are no more and your body is either burned in a furnace or put into a box and buried in the ground where maggots will devour it until only the bones are left, dems the facts me auld son”
But how could one be so cruel to a child, perhaps that’s why we have been telling our children ‘Fairy Tales’ for thousands of years.
Not having Grand Kids, not something to worry about, but, if it had been me, I would have said "don’t ask such things questions earthling, just be grateful that ain’t a Fairy Liquid bottle, you are wielding.
So kind to hard working hands, perhaps they have mild green fairies in heaven, anyway it’s a one way ticket wherever the spirit goes. I used to love the old song “Spirit in the Sky” by Norman Greenbum, that’s what happens when you put Fairy Liquid in your bath tub.
I was looking at an old western today, Jeff Chandler was playing an Apache chief, as far as I knew Jeff was Jewish American, in another western I remembered Hugh O’Brien was an Indian and he was Irish, a really confusing part was when Richard Harris played an English gentleman who turned Indian and Harris was Irish, Jeffery Hunter played a few indian parts too and all the squaws were English or White American actresses. Could they not find any real Indians to play Indian parts back then, what was the problem? did John Wayne shoot them all.
I watched a program on BBC 4 a few months ago, Rich Hall (love that man) brought this up when talking to a native American, I didn’t get the full program but it seems they wouldn’t hire any of them except as extras.
A lot of these white actors were ‘painted up’ for the parts just like the singers and dancers used to be in the Black and White minstrel show years ago,
The only real Indian I remember playing an Indian was Jay Silverheels as Tonto in the Lone Ranger “Get ‘em up Scout”
its called by many names Jem - "racism; facism; white supremacy " etc take ya pic - considering that Jesus was very brown I can’t figure it out!
A lot of names there Jem, the only one I remember is Richard Harris, and that is only for his association with Orville.
Yes indeed Gumbud racism takes many forms, It was a disgrace, Hollywood should hold it’s head down in shame.
I could never stand that Harris and Orville act Spitty.
Now take Rich Hall one of the funniest Americans on the screen today in my opinion, The BBC don’t make enough use of his unique talents, his humour is so dry and he has the perfect face for delivering it. He is very open minded too and says what he thinks.
Exploitation?
How about Amos & Andy?
Extraordinary?
Baby Le Roy*******
Erudition?
Leslie Welch
Excruitiating?
Rowan Atkins
Euthanise?
Bill Oddie
Elevate?
Wilson Keppel & Betty(no.4)
foot-note******* A Bedtime story
The film was notable for the performance of Baby LeRoy, a one-year-old who had been selected from an orphanage by Chevalier and Taurog for his charming appeal. When certain scenes needed to be re-shot, they found that the baby had grown two front teeth, even though the later scenes would be showing the bare gums. There was no way round this.
LeRoy is perhaps best remembered for a dinner table sequence in the W.C. Fields comedy The Old Fashioned Way (1934) in which he throws a handful of custard into the comedian’s face, yanks on his nose, and destroys his pocket watch by tossing it into a bowl of molasses. Fields initially endures each of these indignities, but the scene ends with Fields spotting Baby LeRoy standing in a doorway and giving the toddler a kick to the rear end. The film’s director, William Beaudine, reported that the kick got “the biggest laugh in the picture.”
PS WC Fields was the chap who it was saidof “Anyone who hates animals & children can’t be all bad”
On the subject of Richard Harris, wasn’t he the delusional male lead in THE RULING CLASS, a film about & starring a whole shed load of distinguished veteran & Shakespearen actors, depicting the expensive eccentric lunatics running this country back in the day.
I always thought he was a second rate drunken actor in the same ilk Oliver Reed - all second rate!
Peter O’Toole and Richard Burton were drinking buddies of Harris, between filming jobs they sometimes flew into Dublin for weekend binges, they had their own haunts in the city and no one bothered them.
Who could ever forget Lavatory Meadows RJ.
The strange world of film making in old Hollywood. I read that Clarke Gable had to have his ears cello taped back for the close up shots, and Judy Garland was developing too quickly while making the Wizard of Oz, she had to have her breasts taped. It was all tinsel and tape, even the parting of the Red Sea in the Ten Commandments was done in a fish tank.
Crikey young JEM,
I normally accept without question, fear or favor (USA spelling) anything emanating from your illustrious self…
But you are beginning to inure my trusting nature by your ridiculous assertion regarding the making of the sequence (parting of the RED SEA).
Don’t think badly of me for mentioning this matter , you see, JEM dear boy This sequence has long been my favourite cinema sequence It was filmed, not in an aquarium, but in a clever juggling of film cuttings of waves on the seashore, tacked together, turned on their side & arranged to look like the event of the PARTING.
Phew, got that off my chest.
Thank you for putting me right on the Red Sea RJ, I though the story smelt a bit fishy.
Anybody spot the first Cuckoo this year? I remember when folks would get all excited at first Cuckoo time and write into the papers as soon as they caught a glimpse of the bird “I spotted the first Cuckoo this year!” I was a big deal then, do they still write into The Times about it? why was it so special?
I wouldn’t know a Cuckoo from a Sparrow.
They all get excited around here on Monday mornings when they spot the first bus, a rare sight indeed.
I’m in an inquiring frame of mind today, so feel free to tell me to mind me own business.
I have two questions for you Gumbud me auld son. Have they any Cuckoo’s in Australia? and Can you throw a Boomerang and make it come back? I heard there is an art in using the Boomerang correctly.
Jem, you don’t need to spot the first Cuckoo, you just need to hear it.
W.C. Fields was married in 1900 and separated in 1907, they never divorced and up until his death in 1946 he sent her a weekly cheque. Seems to me W.C. still loved loved her and could not flush her out of his cistern, sorry system.
Today starts the big Cheltenham Racing Festival, I’m all set up in the little Summer cabin with computer and TV, a couple of cans of draught Guinness, plenty of smokes, it’s a beautiful day and the good woman has promised to take lunch out to me when I ring the buzzer “Relax out there now Jem and don’t stir, make sure there’s do draughts at your back, you just enjoy your racing and if you need anything just ring, the best of luck on the horses dear”
I mean they don’t make women like that anymore do they.;-)
The secret is in pronouncing the ‘Boo’ part correctly,Jem.
‘Boo’, [not many people know this] is an Aboriginie word meaning ‘return’. I expect you to disbelieve this.
…but you try throwing an ordinary merang [AUSSIE SPELLING!!!] at Mrs Jem unexpectedly and without shouting ‘BOO’ first…
the A&E nurses will remember you forever-you’ll be a legend!
I always take your word on such matters Pug you know that my learned friend.
The only thing I throw at the missus these days is money Pug, and before I throw it I say Boo woo because it’s braking me heart and I’m crying.
REALLY,Jem???
You mean to say-here,in public-that a picture of the E.U. denominated bullshit,is held closer to your heart than that monochrome photo of Herself,taken in an era of tempestuous romance and troth,that you’ve held so dear,so precious,for these last **** years,guarded with affectionate devotion???
Ohhhh,boy.
I can but hope you enjoy wearing your knackers as earrings,should she discover that truth,old chap! :shock:
