See, folks have got so consumed about how all this stuff got here, no one is noticing just how much stuff is leaving.
Odd you should write that about stuff leaving spitty as whilst I was doing a shop for a neighbour yesterday I stood in an aisle looking at the multitude of choices on offer and ‘Spoilt for choice’ came to mind. Who really wants spoiling when all they want is a bit of cheese or a box of cornflakes. It’s all gone a bit barmy and way over the top. 
The laughable food mind games that producers now ply us with is mind boggling so even halving the many options would still leave us with lots to choose from.
In short I don’t care how stuff leaves our over stocked shelves just so long as we get back to common sense shopping instead of this imbecilic pandering type shop fest.
Right that’s me had my say now I am going to rummage through my 24 multi pack of assorted crisps and decide which flavour to have with my morning cuppa 
Enjoy your crisps Solo, Cheese ’N’ Onion are the only crisps I eat, they went a bit overboard with crisp flavours and ruined the product. birds nest soup flavoured crisps for Gods sake.
Don’t worry about missing stuff Spitty, this is the way I see it.
The learned heads will tell us that all this stuff got here on the backs of astroids, just dropped off like snow off a roof as they passed over this planet, of course sometimes the astroids crashed into the earth and dumped the whole cargo of “stuff” all in the one go, that explains why there is more stuff in some countries than others.
We are all made of “stuff”, although some are made of “sterner stuff”, when we die we will be “stiff stuff” for a while and then we will be recycled into other stuff, whats here on this planet stays on this planet as stuff, albeit different kinds of stuff, by the way the sterner stuff comes off the back of meteorites and not astroids, or so a fella from Mars was telling me, that’s Maher’s pub in Moore Street and not the far side of the moon, but it’s pronounced exactly the same.
I hope that helps, if it doesn’t one can always “get stuffed”;-)
My missus has a stuffed teddy bear up in the attic, she’s had it since she was a child and her mother owned it before her, it looked a bit mangy looking to me the last time I saw it but she reckons it’s worth a good few quid (some stuff is more valuable than other stuff I believe), she’ll never part with it though, she’ll pass it on to the daughter, well and good, she will just keep it in her attic with all her other stuff.
Phew! I’m tired now after typing out all that stuff, it’s just about knocked the stuffing out of me, I think I need a drop of the hard stuff now.
That teddy of Phyllis’s puts me in mind of one I saw on The Repair shop last week and a mankier bear you would be hard pushed to find but the 2 women worked on him and turned him out as fit as new.
As I sat watching I mused wouldn’t it be great if us humans could have that when we get a bit thread bare but the more I watched and the the more I saw how they had to achieve it, I thought to hell with that I’ll stay just the way I am…worn in parts, joints not working proper, hair getting a bit thin… cos as yet I haven’t had the stuffing completely knocked out of me…and thats all that matters. :-D:-D:-D
Yes Solo, watched that, can never envisage having the existing stuffing removed, and replaced with new Stuff.
Some comforting words for those about to fly.
Another newspaper gem for you. At great cost a town in Wales have taken measures to stop you having nookie in their toilets. Can you imagine wanting to use the bogs for a lovin session…sounds potty I know …but there you go takes all kinds …but if you do you will now get water sprays aimed at you, alarms will sound and doors will open.:shock:
Now how are they going to detect this activity…well with weight sensors of course that activate violent movement. Now some poor soul carrying a bit extra flab just wanting to go to the lav with no thoughts of sex on the mind could also set these off and the next thing you know they are soaked, scared half witless and on display to one and all with character left in shreds.
A lot cheaper to bring back those nice toilet attendants who would just turf you out at the sightest hint of hanky panky
Flying was never for me Solo, the boat may take longer but your chances in danger are far better, as I always said about planes, all it take is one loose screw and anything can happen.;-)
I didn’t think Welsh folks were so randy, sex in a toilet is not very romantic is it, it’s the last place I’d want to have it, ugh! surrounded by drab tiling and evil smells, and what a waste of money, as you rightly say in the old days the attendants kept the public toilets in great order and they put up with no messin’. I knew a fella who was an attendant in one of the bigger toilets in O’Connell St., poor fella was sacked, they were stock taking and there was a shit missing. (sorry but I just had to stick that old chestnut in :-))
Alas all lost to “progress”
I’m a candlelight dinner and satin sheets man meself, I used to like doing my wooing with patience and a bit of style, but everyone to their own taste as the monkey said when he licked his backside.
The wife had the windows open all last night, she sweats a lot in the Summertime so I said nothing and just put up with the wind howling and the bunting flapping all night, she has the bunting out for the big match final on Sept 1 in Croke Park, featuring old rivals Dublin and Kerry, but as they say Dublin for the cup and Kerry for the holidays.
OPEN WINDOWS ON A WINDY MORNING.
The wife is very feminine, gentle and meek
She’s also a bit of a nature freak
I got up early to have a pee
The window was open and the wind blew free
It blew cold on the corn of my shivering foot
And froze together the two cheeks of my butt.
Now all this nature stuff is alright by me
And I love to hear the buzz of the bee
But some things can be taken too far
Like the wind being with you wherever you are
So I got back into bed and curled up in a ball
But jumped up in fright as the mirror blew off the wall.
“For God’s sake missus, this is the last straw!”
As I picked a splinter of glass from my left jaw
“It’s all too much for this old geezer
I’d be better off if I slept in the freezer”
“Go down and get the hoover and suck it all up
And if your making tea, bring me up a cup”
Dear Lord, If ever a man suffered.;-)
Great poem Jem
Satin sheets…OMW that takes me back a few years when things were a lot more livelier
Sometimes you wish for things not knowing the consequences…then when you get what you wish for and find out the consequences…you wish you hadn’t wished for it in the first place.
I always wished for satin sheets and eventually my wish was granted with a gift set of beautifull peach satin ones…and we could not wait to make the bed up with them. They looked and felt exactly as I had always imagined them to be…so eager to try them out I took a flying leap onto the bed…slid on the satin sheets…kept on sliding and didn’t stop… till I hit the far wall with an almighty thud. Stunned is not the word you want to use at a time like this… but stunned I was. Killed any thoughts of passion pretty quick I can tell you :shock:
When we had finally stopped laughing I had those satin sheets off the bed quicker than you can say Jack Flash because one thing I knew, flannel sheets may sound unromantic but they are a lot safer, far more reliable…and lets be honest, much warmer than any longed for fancy satin sheets. :-D:-D:-D
I think that says it all for satin sheets Solo, anyway you survived the ordeal. 
Of course I never actually got to the satin sheets stage, a fully covered roll in the hay in farmer Quinn’s barn was about all one could hope for back then, like the fruit dealers in Moore Street used to say if you manually inspected the apples or pears “Don’t touch the fruit unless you’re buying” all the girls would say was “Don’t squeeze me till I’m yours” in other words march her up the aisle first.
But who could blame them, they had respect for themselves and that’s always a good thing, today it’s anything goes anywhere, is that a good thing or a bad thing?, only time will tell.
My old Dad used to sing this when he had a few on him, here’s everyone having a go at it, young and old one big happy gang.
The vocalist don’t look that chuffed.
Sombre folks to the left, game bird to the right.
Preconceptions, who needs um.
Now in his late eighties he probably creaks a bit but he’s a legend spitty.
It looks like the Health nannies want to ban our sweets of old to sort out this obesity problem.
Although I dont have an overly active sweet tooth I do enjoy the occasional old fashioned sherbert lemon, black jack or Bon bon and I would still sell my soul for Colstfoot rock or a proper walnut whip…
I can’t remember anyone banging on about obesity when if we were lucky to get a few coppers we went into our local sweetshop where we could take as long as we liked taking great care to get the most we could get for our money. There was a real art to sweetie shopping. We knew those huge glass jars held the nectar of the god so we viewed the contents with awe and respect.
We had the usual teeth warnings from our parents but the amount we ate then is nothing compared to what is guzzled today and there lies the problem. Moderation seems to have gone out of the window.
Those Health nannies are missing the obvious point that we did not have much money to spend on sweets so obesity was something that never came into our thinking and thats what they need to sort out now…so keep yer hands off our old fashioned sweets.
Anyone for an aniseed ball
I love the opening lines in that old song (Courting in the kitchen)
“Come single belle and beau, to me now pay attention
Don’t ever fall in love, it’s the devil’s own invention”
Wiser words were never spoken.;-)
I have to admit to having a sweet tooth myself, so there’a a lethal concoction if ever there was one, sugar, nicotine, and alcohol, according to the experts I should be dead long ago, fact is I never felt healthier in me life, experts me arse.
As a kid my favourites were, Bulls eyes, Sailors chew toffee, liquorice assorts, Sugar barley sticks, and the black menthol tasting toffee, Couch-no-more, with a Woodbine in one hand and a bar of Cough-no-more in the other I’d be as happy as Larry.;-)
I’d say most of those are no longer available, why make “Cough-no-more” when nobody’s allowed smoke-no-more.
Today I’m content with the odd bag of Werther’s original and a couple of Kit Kats, I do love my Kit Kat coffee breaks, how’s this for a new short Kit Kat ad.
The king is seated on his throne looking very bored, his jester asks him would he like a Kit Kat, the king sits up straight and says in a stern voice “Yes why not, and make it snappy”
Kit Kat-break-snappy, get it? Aw Christ, it’s worse he’s getting’ in his old age.
Your cough no more sounds like our cough candy which you can still buy. Bit sugary but very yummy.
Whist sitting on the pier yesterday enjoying a 99 ice cream and watching the world, the visitors and seagulls go by it was interesting to note just how clever our flying feathered brain boxes are.
We locals take no prisoners with them and one steely look into a seagulls eyes …or beak depending on yer eye sight…lets em know just who is the bosss in these ere parts. A “don’t mess with me look” gives it to them straight.
Not so with visitors who fall for every trick in a seagull repertoire. Apart from the obvious Top Gun dive attack which incidentally shows a lack of finesse and artistic ability they are masters at limping, wing trailing and the dying swan neck all for sympathy feeding. But the best is the cute appeal…put the starving chick in front …then grab whatever the visitors throw for him… works everytime.
No point in moaning about them either just because they are brainier than you. They have just learnt how to play the game very well.
It always makes me smile when people use the words “Bird brain” to describe a stupid person, birds are so clever when you consider the size of their brains in compassion to ours, indeed I know some big brain heads who couldn’t hold a candle to birds as regards intelligence.
Phyllis is always looking out the kitchen window at the birds, she hangs a container thing from the washing line filled with balls of compressed stuff and whatever the stuff is made from the birds love it, the logic behind hanging it high on the line is that the bigger birds can’t balance on it therefore giving the smaller birds a chance to grub up, she’d spend all day looking at them if she could.
Now seagulls, they scare me, far too brazen for my liking, thankfully there hasn’t been too many around here this year.
Is it true that if you sprinkle salt on a birds tail it can’t fly? and if you pull a goldfish backwards in a fish bowl it drowns?:shock:
I used to like these Byrds, they’re a bit long in the tail now though, but aren’t we all says you.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=/fUSeJtqHIKE?list=RDfUSeJtqHIKE
Birds are just like humans, they spend a good deal of the day just Winging it.
Then there are “Birds”, lets not go there.
Salt didn’t work for you either