Yes, when I can be arsed, or fall over them.
Bragger!
Well we have 5 in the conservatory, 4 in the lounge, 3 in each bedroom, 2 in the attic, and 1 in the jacks, beat that! 
Marching out in their Bearskins.
My older brother served six years as an Irish Guardsman, I remember him telling me that the Bearskin he wore was actual Bearskin and cost about 300 quid, that was back in the sixties. I didn’t believe him, one could nearly buy a small country house for that back then, but I’ve just looked it up and he was right.
“The standard bearskin of the British Foot Guards is 18*inches tall, weighs 1.5 pounds and is made from the fur of the Canadian black bear.[6] However, an officer’s bearskin is made from the fur of the Canadian brown bear as the female brown bear has thicker, fuller fur and is dyed black. An entire skin is used for each hat.[7] The British Army purchase the hats, which are known as caps, from a British hatmaker which sources its pelts from an international auction. The hatmakers purchase between 50 and 100 black bear skins each year at a cost of about £650 each.[8] If properly maintained, the caps last for decades.” Wiki
An entire skin is used for one hat!
Talk about Buffalo Bill doing away with the Bison, I wonder how much he was getting a skin. that fella must have been worth a fortune. Surely they use nylon synthetic black hair nowadays?
Happily the Black Bears are plentiful today, anyway with all the cuts in defence lately the guards will truly be marching out in their own pelts, an even bigger tourist attraction at the palace gates. 
I used to wear a bare skin once - I think it started off when I was very young and was pretty small - yes pretty and small - I used to toddle around in my bare skin and march up and down the room playin with my cymbal?
when I got older the girls seemed to be very interested in my bare skin but I used to charge them a lot of money to touch it ya see cos me mum told me she and da made it especially for me.
sometimes I would go for a swim with me bare skin on and I would get arrested and told you cannot show ya bare skin here ? - so then I had to cover it all up and leave three little openings for me hands and head
erhmm I’ll tell ya more tomorrow - I can’t bare all at once they say it’s not proper??
I can’t say what I want to say. I keep slurring my words.
crocodile tears??
Nah:mrgreen:
Shed?
he needs to ‘shed’ a bizarre mindset soon?? but perhaps he needs more support from you RJ?
I’ve known some funny geezers, two of the funniest were maintenance guys at a factory where I worked. They were often off sick due to the booze, and I would take their early morning phone calls to register their absence. I often asked what was wrong so I could tell their gaffer, and they would say stuff like beriberi, trench foot, or scarlet fever:lol:. one of them asked finding out I had a sister “does she like little fat ugly men”
Good Morning Possums
I’m warming up to post something later.
Oh it might be the weather
Modesty overcame me RJ and I deliberately omitted the outbuildings as it would appear to some that I was boasting. Fact is that when we were granted the free TV license we went slightly overboard.
It’s always the same ain’t it, 36 TV’s and nothing on any of them.
I just hope nobody brings up computers, especially Apple Mac’s, we got so many that the neighbours call our house “The Orchard”
The only Mac I’m interested in is a Whisky Mac.
Never had one of them Spitty, I had to look it up, Scotch Whisky and green ginger wine?, don’t imagine I’d fancy it.:shock:
Thinking back on those six slices of ham RJ, I remember during the foot and mouth crisis when they were burning all the cows in big fields, some enterprising butcher cashed in on it and set up a stall by the roadside, he was selling sick slices of roast beef for a pound.
did you say ‘sick’ slices??? OMG - I do hope you didn’t you sick thing you!
there’s nothing sicker than a Jem merchant always claiming poverty!
Yes Gummy SICK slices, sick cows. it was supposed to be a sick joke.:-)
I’m just about comfortable in me old age Gummy tink yo, not to be CONSTRUED as well off (See Pug, I managed to get that word in at last)
The racing is in full swing on TV now so I’m heading up to the pub to watch it on the big screen there, see yis all later.:-)
Y’DID it,Jem!
I am SO proud of you,bruv…you go win a few Euros-you deserve it!
I fear I have been misCONSTRUED for in my eagerness to promulgate the benefits of a succinct communication, I chose to use a word with several interpretations in colloquial vernacular.
SHED, the word, turns out to be blessed with a thousand meaning in both speech and objects
Mind you, Jem cottoned on straight away.