I lost my signal!
Anyway I like the jokes.
We saw an Elvis impersonator last night.
There was only one table left at the venue.
I politely asked the one guy sat there if we could join him. Well he was German and an Elvis impersonator in his country. He kept signing to me - badly!
My boy’s got the giggles, hubby just glared and drank his beer. I spotted another table and moved before he asked me to dance.
It does make me laugh when other nationalities get the words wrong.
The following act was singing YMCA and I had to cover my laughter when he sang you can get a good feel instead of meal.
you sure know how to pull 'em SP - must be your 36B cup??
Hotel Hurzbruch……huh huh, danke veilmals.
To be or not to B. That is the question.
Not big enough for you.
Errrrr what?
As I’ve often said Phyllis has seven sisters and in my youth I “fixed up” two of my mates with two of them, one couple went on to get married and the other couple were just three weeks together when she called it all off, it seems that he was a lover of the Elvis musicals and everytime he left her home to her gate he would start SINGING to her!:shock:
He had a terrible voice but she hadn’t the heart to tell him so, she just put up the embarrassment as the odd neighbour would pass by tittering. Finally she could take it no more.
i may have posted something before about fellas that sing to their girlfriends, to my mind it’s the weirdest thing, anytime I left a girl home singing was the last thing on my mind, I mean that’s strictly for the likes of Howard Keel, Cliff Richard, and wannabe Elvis’s.
We used to have thousands of Elvis impersonators over here but I don’t see any doing the rounds now, maybe they all buggered off to Bulgaria.
I was talking to a Bulgarian only last week, he was telling me he had to leave Sofia in a hurry, “Why?” I asked “Was she pregnant?”
Gummy did you ever sing to the girl at the hardware store?
what a very personal questions you do ask I beg your pardon Jemmy lad - but I will forgive you on this occasion and not report you for your regular beating from Phyllis!!
Now what was the bloody question oh yes singing to miss Bottom heh - well I have got a sort of singsong voice they say - and she did bring out the best in me that’s for sure - so perhaps I did sing - sing for my supper perhaps??
I have not seen Mizz Bottom for some time as there is now a new manager FEMALE - who does not approve of me sitting taking coffee with the staff! - how banal!! - all my services were always free!!
I so love to see the Brits at play.
A three course meal for less than £6 !
This little one eyed cat got the chicken leftover. I’m such a sucker for these ferral cats.
Then the karaoke I could imagine Gummy singing I want sex on the beach, wearing his camouflage skirt, Jem tapping on the table, myself doing a bad pole dance, while Spitty watches the moon.
oh how lovely but I’ll tell ya for nought already SP - sex on a sandy beach is not the best option at all - think of the abrasion marks - I don’t mind pushing sand up hill but someone has got to eventually unload it?
but I do love your depiction of the lads at play - charming - bad pole dance - never - we’d all grease it for ya first wouldn’t we lads?? - form a queue ; form a queue - no shoving spittie!!
Gummy Bear it is a song!!!
I’m going to behave today.
It is boiling hot and I have a hangover.
yes but it sTILL shows a complete misunderstanding of LOVE ; WANTING SEX and SAND!! spittie can you explain the mico views?/
Now look ear, I am going to the beach in a little while, and I don’t want that thought.
It is Sunday today, I need a day of rest.
All the balconies here have clothes horses.
I have just seen what I thought was a pool cover float down, OMG it’s someone’s BIG knickers!:shock:
SP - are you getting any time to relax?? - we do worry about you ya know - BUT if you need some extra time there we’ll understand won’t we lads - Jem Jem wake up - spittie NO stop pickin ya nose - RJ RJ!!! he’s gone wandering off again - he’s crazy in his wheelchair!!
Well, sit on a packet of frozen Peas.
Big knickers and packets of cold sweet peas what variety, ain’t life a bunch of roses. I’m a marrowfat pea man myself, remember the ones you had to steep overnight? my old aunt Fanny used to steep her big knickers in a basin or water too with a few scoops of Rinso added, adults don’t seem to realise that kids see all this going on and remember it so they can embarrass them in later years, so be mindful of what you do when there are kids around. 
My dog Rocky walks through my garden of cabbages and peas.
Its sunny with a nice cool gentle breeze here today, herself and me are having afternoon refreshments in the garden, she’s reading and I’m listening to an audio book, The Return of Sherlock Holmes, several cases for the master detective to solve.
RJ come back, our sanity is restored, honest to God.
I’m staying crazy.
I tried sitting on a tin of marrowfat peas, all I got was indentations.
It is 8pm in 5 mins, the sun is still shining and I am sat on my balcony in my bikini.
We are going to watch a Michael Jackson Tribute tonight. I’m not planning to drink.
I sat on some Podded Peas, and my Bum started “Peeling”.
Gawd Spitty, I had read twice, I thought I read prodded.:shock:
Lettuce not have any misunderstandings.
Nor cabbages.
Wot are you telling me?
Cucumbers are cool.
Hold on I get it! Little Jem, he won’t be happy with you.
Just tryin to get my “Five” a day in, so are Courgettes btw.