Hi Guys
Jem I guess you have a Queen size mattress. We have King, never understood why the Queen one is bigger.
Fruity why are you always right?
Gumbud I hope you are Ok. I saw the incredibly high temperatures on the news. Take Care x
well you’re right but OZ is a big country 47C in Sydney [3 days drive away -imagine driving 3 days non-stop to get to the other side of your own country!] but we are having monsoonal rain here and low temps with cloud cover - sometimes the sun does come out - as the actor said to the actress!
I here you are all being swept over with Australian flu - well serves you all right for thinking you could beat us at test cricket! - but don’t stress we are having flu here but only in the cold wet and windy places and that ain’t us!
https://s18.postimg.org/zbzm6fent/sport-cricket-sport-rain-damp-cartoons-mmon28_low_cricket.jpg
Yep, that Umpire has the Brit Spirit, those three Cobbers look a bit nonplus.
Just heard an Actress on the telly say “you’ve got to follow through”, is that a good idea?
"watchin tellie too much??? yes of course - it gives you too many imponderable topics to grapple with!!
At last a subject I can warm to and mebbe discuss.
I knew scatology would pop up sooner or later.
I wonder if when “touching cloth”"
develops ,“follow though” is inevitable.
Over 70 yr olds should never assume a fart is only a fart
My gramps used to say about his favourite brekky
“After having porridge, then farted
you are back where you started.”
Did you know Thomas Crapper descendent is U-bend Bolt.
I thought not
lovely to see you back old fart - your humor is always sadly missed when you are away!! I thought Crappers first descendant was Andy Crap?? he used to say "has everyone seen my crap - I know I put it down somewhere - please don’t sh…t on it - it will spoil the peak!
Yes, one of Thomas’s relations is in Coronation Street, Roy Crapper.
this topic seems to be goin around the bolt?? perhaps we should try to ‘bend’ it into more of a [SIZE=“7”]U[/SIZE]
don’t you think?
Ah, I think I now understand when people say they have had their benefits crapped. Well that’s what it feels like to them.
Hello Possums
Lovely to see young Robert back in the fold.
Glad you are OK Gummy - 3 DAYS!!!
I could be at your door before then.
I will come back in a mo and think of something to lighten the load.
Yes 70 is a dodgy age for farting RJ, nice to see you back in top form young man.
Benefits capped, I like that Fruity, well no one is going to cork me while I’m still alive.
Two years ago I decided to grow a small beard, despite the protests of the wife, I think seventy is a milestone in ones life and anyone who makes it to that age in one piece deserves to go a bit mad, she has got used to me hairy face now.
Young RJ will be approaching that milestone in the near future, wonder what he has in store for the occasion, Pug and Spitty are not retired yet, reckless youngsters that they are, I wouldn’t dare ask Fruity how old he was.
As I said to herself today when she asked me how long I had the beard, “It could be worse my dear, I could start painting me toenails pink, wear flowery frocks, and carry a purple handbag, there’s no fruit like an old fruit as that famous old gay Quentin Crisp used to say” Her reply was short and sharp “Your a bit long in the tooth old boy to be changing horses when your three quarters the way across the river” They always have the right thing to say to knock the stuffin’ outa ya don’t they.
Now Quentin Crisp would always say
Even when it was risky to do so
He was happy to be a merry old gay
And he didn’t mind who knew so.
Crisp quote: “Never keep up with the Jones’s, drag them down to your level”
Now there was a man before his time, pity he didn’t live to see the freedom and equality of todays gay folks.
I heard an old song on the radio today.
Love me, love my dog.
http://ak-hdl.buzzfed.com/static/enhanced/web05/2012/1/16/22/enhanced-buzz-6917-1326772262-29.jpg
JEST you do,for HORRIBLE my dog is!
BITE me he does - and ferociously snarling,he loves to!
HIM,this is…[Shitlegs,his name is]
https://s18.postimg.org/v49vvbek9/I_ll_pretend_to_be_nice.jpg
Shitlegs is one of the happiest looking dogs I’ve ever seen Pug, you must be a good master to him, he’s got nothing but love in his eyes, sorta like Gummy when he visits yerwoman in the hardware shop.
What a cute little dog, he looks a happy little chappie
What a cute doggie Pug:-)
Now, where is Gummy I have had a light bulb moment!
Get yourself a dog, or borrow one, it attracts the Women.
Preferably one with a Doris Day hairstyle:-D
Head off to the Hardwear Store to buy a sack trolly.
Ms fancy bottom will swoon.
well for those who are interested in the “escapades of Ms Bottom” she is a fast moving lady and works from several establishments sequentially - which means she is probably getting multiple orgasms on cranium/cerebral level?
I think I have probably just become a toyboy - but I do take her eyes of the keyboard!
but it is a small town and tongues will wag a lot if encouraged.
so I am biding my time and watching the ‘bottom’ move - did I tell you she was a kiwifruit?
for goodness sake sweetie pie - I don’t want Ms Bottom diverting her attention to dogs and I have never seen a dog entire the establishment - I think it might be frowned upon.
I remember my last visits to Austria and UK - and to my amazement discovered dogs sitting with their owners in restaurants and pugs - I think here in OZ we are slightly more advanced in hygiene!!
as to a sack trolley never come across the term or article but at my next visit to Ms Bottom I will ask her how she would like to parade around the store in a sack trolley - sounds interesting - or I could just give her a ‘ride’ mounted from the rear??
You hang in there Gummy me lad, your onto a good thing methinks.
Back in the 1980’s I had an amorous young apprentice called Hector, he was 18 years old and had never been out on a date with a girl, he was shy and a bit of a loner, he didn’t go dancing or into pubs, but he was dead keen on meeting a girl.
I told him I couldn’t help him out, I wasn’t used to dating girls meself, I was practically born with the wife I knew her that long, it wasn’t a wedding really it was just a handing over ceremony of me from my mother to herself, there was no in between time.
One day he came into work and told me that he asked someone else and they had suggested he get himself a dog and take it for regular walks in the park, yerman said that all girls love a man who loves animals and girls were bound to stop him in the park and ask him questions about his dog, and he could strike up a relationship from there.
It worked and the lad was married two years later to a lovely girl from Galway he met on one of his park walks.
So you have a good point there Sweetie, it seems where there are dogs and parks lorve is not far away.
Just a romantic thought, wouldn’t it have been nice for the bride to carry an empty plastic bag instead of a bouquet and walk under a bridge of poop scoopers coming out of the church, well theme weddings are all the rage.