I am reminded of the teacher asking the class to come up with something with the word Timbuktu in it and the usual Johnny stands up.
“As Tim and I walked through Kent
We spied three maidens in a tent
Their hair was black and their eyes were blue
I bucked one and Timbuktu” 
Next time she’ll be looking for something with the words Glocca Morra in it.
Did you know there is no such place as Glocca Morra.
That was a lovely piece of work in the poetry section RJ, the one about the golden haired lady, a nice story, yes it’s always better to leave well enough alone.
This is true and I kid you not, my wife’s hair is still the same auburn colour as it always was, she’s 71 now and hasn’t got a single grey hair, she never dyed it in her life, i think that’s very strange. Maybe there’s some truth in what they say about worrying turning you grey, she never worried about anything, she left it all to me.
There was a young chap who lived on our street and he worked in the fur trade as an apprentice, he had a lovely head of thick red hair but it all fell out when he was seventeen, they thought it was something to do with working on fur, or “the Minks jinks” as he called it, you know the way some hatters used to go nuts from the chemicals they used, anyway he got a red wig and wore it all his life. I bumped into him outside Specsavers (I believe that happens a lot outside Specsaver shops) a few weeks ago, he would be about 70 now, he still had a roaring red wig on him, winder if it was the same one he had when he was seventeen, it was in the same Elvis style, he was always a big fan, true what they say, some folks never change.
Thanks, Jem, I pondered over this next bit after reading your notion "people don’t change
Robert Burns
O would some power the giftie gie us to see ourselves as others see us.
(O would some power the gift to give us to see ourselves as others see us.)
I had a strange encounter the other night, as I sat in my darkened lounge, strange illuminated circles appeared on the vacant emulsioned walls, and a voice said “I know you can hear me Earthman Spitty”, I said “Is that the voice of the Mystery Ron”.
ESPECIALLY if you happen to be Jonathan Woss!
[don’t you think it a tad iwonic that his surname starts with an ‘R’?]
rising damp I’d say - and too much of the golden amber!
In the beginning God covered the earth with broccoli, cauliflower, and spinach, green, yellow, and red vegetables of all kinds; so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.
Then using God’s bountiful gifts, Satan created Ben and Jerry’s and Krispy Kreme. And Satan said, “You want hot fudge with that?” And Man said, “Yes!” and Woman said, “I’ll have another with sprinkles.” And lo they gained 10 pounds.
And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman might keep the figure that Man found so fair.
And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat, and sugar from the cane, and combined them. And Woman went from size 2 to size 10.
So God said, “Try my fresh green salad.”
And Satan presented crumbled Bleu Cheese dressing and garlic toast on the side. And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the repast.
God then said, “I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them.”
And Satan brought forth deep fried coconut shrimp, butter dipped lobster chunks and chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own platter. And Man’s cholesterol went through the roof.
God then brought forth running shoes so that his Children might lose those extra pounds.
And Satan came forth with a cable TV with remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels. And man and woman laughed and cried before the flickering light and started wearing stretch jogging suits.
Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with potassium and good nutrition.
Then Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fried them in animal fats and added copious quantities of salt. And Man put on more pounds.
God then gave lean beef so that Man might consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite.
And Satan created McDonald’s and the 99-cent double cheeseburger. Then Lucifer said, “You want fries with that?” and Man replied, “Yes! And super size’ em!” And Satan said, “It is good.” And Man went into cardiac arrest.
God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.
And Satan created The National Health Service…
Amen
In the last century, Life Expectancy (time wise) has nigh doubled, were the Humanists responsible for Creation, creation of the Pharmaceutical Companies, that is?
[CENTER]IN THE BEGINNING …
very clever Gummy.
I have to ask…
is it original?[/CENTER]
You men make me laugh with your wise and witty posts … long may they continue! 
Amen to that 
nothing is original RJ you know that you are teasing me - all thoughts come from GOD and she may not be original either?:shock:
but I still love my greens and spuds; always cook in olive oil and sometimes even bathe in it!
Thankyou Gummy for giving me an opportunity to quote from the good book once more.
Take this quote for instance
[B][I]
Ecclesiastes 1:9New International Version (NIV)
9 What has been will be again,
what has been done will be done again;
there is nothing new under the sun.[/I][/B]
circa 600 bc
Ps, do you find it spurs you on to write inspiring stuff, knowing that Mags & May are reading our output enthusiastically (bless them).
God? She? now you’re really pushing the boat out.
Those who set out to debunk myths sometimes find they have mythed the point, you dig?
Time for a break in the communal gardens with a hipflask of original Southern Comfort.
Football is on the tv tonight, but I would sooner watch my union jack underwear going round and round in the laundry room
Ah RJ but what sun ? surely there are myriads in the universe sonny Jim!
I feel mythed about the whole damn thing!
Thank you ladies for your kind remarks.
Ecclesiastes 1:9New International Version (NIV)
9 What has been will be again,
what has been done will be done again;
there is nothing new under the sun.
circa 600 b
Circa 600 B, why the B? could they not find the original A?
I believe that everything has been done before and then all was lost in a great global natural disaster. Have we learned anything from this?, not a bit we just just keep discovering old lost stuff and think we are the bee’s knees, we are even doing away with paper now and closing all the libraries, all the stuff is going to be available on one big massive cloud, could that become cloud 9?
At least the stone age folks had sense enough to leave their knowledge on rocks in caves, had it not been for the carvings in caves we would know bugger all about our own early history. Methinks it’s time to put all our important stuff onto stone slabs and store it in a big hole in the back garden like they used to, only good solid stone can withstand all that nature throws against us, just ask Fred Flintstone, he had the right idea but the modernists just laughed at him. I’m going out to the shed now to find a sharp chisel and a sound hammer, I sent the missus up to the quarry with a handcart and a sledgehammer to fetch me a large rock, I want to write my will, I told her not to forget a few medium sized stones too just in case I have to add a codicil or two.;-)
Not so Gummy, not now the Units are in the Spreadsheet, it’s good to observe the Unitarianism.
That’s why I often print a copy of the Spreadsheet, and leave it with the local Stonemason.
YYUR
YYUB
ICUR
YY4ME
B s/b BC, but I had some pizza crumbs in the keyboard and lost all the “Cs” I typed hence for B read BC.
Afternoon tea is ready “Coming dear…” I’ll shake the keyboard afterwards to release all the trapped “Cs”
I find the whole thing plausible but am between a rock and a hard place to promulgate it’s likelyhood,
as you say, we just don’t know.
It’s rather like the time when 2 scientists met God to demonstrate they had produced life in a jam jar.
“Ok show me” said the Lord
The cocksure scientists prattled on and said first take some dirt
HOLD ON God boomed
Go FIND YOUR OWN DIRT…
That raised a chuckle RJ, one of your rare ‘Dirty’ jokes.
“Oh to be an celestial rock hurling through the sky
Travelling on forever and passing everything by
No worry no cares, no graces no airs
Free from all life’s traps and snares
Going at speed to wherever I desire
Looking for water ‘cos my arse is on fire.
Just been watching an old film “Sewers of Gold” 1979, about a bank robbery. I was enjoying it until I realised that they were not going to get away with it, they weren’t allowed to back then in the films, shame really because nobody was hurt and they were all safety deposit boxes that were opened and the probable ill gotten gains removed. So many good old films are ruined when you know they must be caught in the end, what petty hypocrisy treating everyone like children, how did we put up with that for so long?
