Don’t be ashamed … deaths and wills seem to flush out all the obnoxious low lives.
I know one occasion where a hospital had to plead for the next of kin to come and collect the deceased’s body from the hospital morgue … it had been left there a full 10 days waiting to be claimed whilst living beneficiaries were bickering over who was in charge of the body, the house, and executing the will.
I know …it was my brother lying forgotten in the morgue.
Same here. Before my MIL died her oldest son took her to the solicitors and got her to change her will so that he became sole executor (without solicitor) and whereas in her previous Will she wanted her house and contents to be split between her 3 children, he got her to agree to leave him most of her valuable antiques. He told nobody about this outing. He allowed her to leave her jewellery to her daughter and no mention was made of anything for my husband!
Firstly it was most odd him even taking her out because that was an absolute one off. Secondly my MIL always treated her kids the same and would never have not specified anything for my husband. Her daughter did most of the caring for her and for years MIL came to stay with us for 2 weeks at a time as we lived furthest away. Usually about 5 times a year. Always Easter, Xmas, her birthday and a couple of extra fortnights in the summer. He honestly did absolutely nothing for her as he was always “SO busy.”
When she passed away the 3 siblings went to sort out the bungalow and everything they looked at he said “I’m having that.” From furniture to vacuum cleaners, from gardening tools to ladders he had just about everything. I believe my husband brought home a few family photos, some towels and tea towels and a tankard we had bought his late Dad. His sister got a small book case, some photos and some knitting wool! They both walked out in disgust and have never spoken to the brother and it’s 18 years since she died.
It is just dreadful the levels some people sink to. Sympathise with you!
Yes same here in my family . Mum had 7 kids and the youngest lived with her till she died he had never paid rent and never had responsibilities mum had made a will.apparently but after she died a new will came out and youngest brother got the lot ! The house contents everything , yet we had another brother who really was desperately in need due to M H problems and work . As the years passed youngest brother sold and pocketed around 180k , aged 55 hardly works and lives in a nice house paying minimal rent to a friend . Lives the life of riley . He has never offered to help any of us , but there ya go that’s life
Just shows the importance of making a will.
It never fails to amaze me that so many people don’t .
Of course if you have nothing to leave that is fine but most of us have accumulated somethings in our journey through life and if we wish them to be fairly distributed as we would wish make a will.
And revise it every five years or if your circumstances change .
Another thing is to give things away while you are still alive .
Funny this topic should come up, mrs,p, is taking her mum to the solicitor tomorrow to make a will ( she won’t be in with her) , she want’s the house to be split three ways equally, we just don’t trust her two brothers wives as they would probably say she promised us this and that , all gets very messy without a will.
When my grandma passed away she didn’t leave a will so it was divided up between my Dad and his brother. My Dad went down on the day it was decided to do the deed and when he arrived at grandma’s the house had been cleared of everything, and the bungalow was a council property. His brother agreed to pass on one or two ornaments and photographs, but we didn’t see either my Dads share or my uncle again. My uncle passed away and we were never informed when or where the funeral was.
Fortunately, I’m an only child and when Mum and Dad passed away, I got the lot!
Mrs Fox was also an only child, and she also was left the lot, with a nestegg for our daughter.
Our only daughter will get the lot when we go, but to be honest, she gets most of it now.
I’ve just been through this and my brother and I sorted things out between us with no falling out or disagreements and I’m so glad, we love each other dearly so I always thought we’d be OK but when I read about what other people have to go through I’m horrified and realise how lucky I was
We both stayed at Mum’s house until the funeral and to sort out. The house was left half each to us and any savings. He did make me chuckle in a tearful way because the only things from the house he took home were an old wooden cat of mum’s, the spare Dyson and a bottle of Drambuie! I’ll keep a couple of bits, sell what is worth selling and give him half and then the rest to the charity shops or the tip
Mum and Dad were very down to earth about it and would have approved of that and clipped us both round the ear if we’d squabbled over it
That’s fine if the Will genuinely is your own decision. In my case (above) my BIL “persuaded” my MIL to put everything in his favour. English was not her first language so it was quite easy for him to do.
The 3 kids still got equal shares from the proceeds of the house but he got all the antiques and just about all the bungalow contents.
My father dies intestate too but he didn’t have much to leave anyone. My mother made a will soon after leaving various sums to all the girls in the close family and what was left divided equally between my brother (executor) and me. Once the dust had settled following her demise, and the will had been probated, my brother and I found a goodly sum of money hidden in a chest of drawers which was going to charity. My brother wanted to split this with me but I refused because he and his wife had basically done all mom’s shopping and cleaning for several years without recompense. I told him to take his wife on holiday with my half of this money.
I had the same thing with my sister she wanted to grab everything. She even went to see mum in the hospice when she only had a few days left to live and got her to sign a codecil to take goods out of the house and contents left to me. She was also left a house way more valuable than the one left to me. Not only that she could not wait even a decent time to grab mums wedding and engagement ring from the hospice. His was done behind my back which made it far worse in my opinion, if she had told me of her intentions I would have said fair enough but she didn’t.
Something I will never forgive her for, now we are on better terms but this leave a nasty taste in the mouth.
Friends you can choose, families you have no choice in