Arthur told the cashier, it is dangerous to transport petrol in a holdall, then smiled at Brenda, he knew she was a “Bag for Life”.
Jamie oliver was the last man on Earth, which was great; he could finally stop showing off.
Arthur sneered at Brenda, a prank caller had said his telephone wire was too long and would she give her end a big tug.
Arthur regretted sneering, he realised where telephony was concerned, it was better to give than receive.
Brenda was full of her self, she just refused to look into the mirror, and, on the off chance when she did, she went ex directory.
Arthur knew, in his heart of hearts, he would never really satisfy Brenda intellectually.
Brenda accepted that in Arthur’s case it wasn’t infatuation, but the real thing.
Arthur was up to his neck in swamp & crocodiles, completely forgetting his original aim was …
To visit Harrods for a…
A chance visit, it wasn’t Arthurs fault he noticed a glint in the eye of a manakin, and fantasized about window undressing, just then he got Tangoed.
Arthur had never entered a pub where the chairs and tables had been affixed firmly to the floor…but Brenda seemed rather at home.
It wasn’t the first time Brenda had absorbed the aroma of a sticky carpet, but it was the first time it wasn’t through her nose, this time it was her bare buttocks, taking the pummelling, she thought, is this what nylon is all about!
Arthur gave Brenda the slip & was perfecting his MIRROR carp mating call when he slipped up on a clump of Fontinalis Antipyretica and his plans to post on youtube were thwarted.
What happened to BRENTWOOD NYLONS?
Arthur was glad he passed on the slip, before it got doused, no bookie would honour a damp slip.
Arthur made up some anagrams of Damp slips but Brenda was neither impressed or vaguely interested in his efforts …“What is Fontinaliis Antipyretica ?”, she asked.
She got married, Brentford Nylons however, was sold at a knock-down price.
Brenda complained that Arthur ignored her to which he replied"what?"