Never judge a book by it’s cover Spitty
I was going to add that, but, did not want to get into disagreement with my Gut.
That would be helpful … Thank you …
My apologies Omah.
And I apologise to all other forum members who might have felt, justifiably, that it spoilt the thread for them.
well it was in Sainsbury’s in Oct 2020 likely during Covid restrictions so not likely to have been for non essentials. It was a strange year.
I guess that was part of the reason why this occurred when otherwise it might not have Annie…
True, but if someone is battling something already then things can upset or infuriate them more easily due to having a low threshold for pain or patience. This is also part of the reason why I would give older people a little more leeway than I would a younger healthy adult - aches and pains and trials and tribulations of just living, with worry and what not really can have an impact on a person’s mental state.
Maybe I just try to look for the good in people, tho accept some people are just beyond evil (just don’t think this woman is one of them).
That’s a very fine quality Azz, and one that I subscribe to. I always try to look at any discussion objectively, but based on what has been reported I just think Ms Grey seems to be an angry anti-social lady who should have conducted herself better and considered the safety of other road users before going off on one. It doesn’t matter who was in the right in the eyes of the law, surely the death of someone should be avoided whatever.
I was out shopping today and opened the door to a small charity shop. Went through and was aware of people behind me so held the door for them and a young man about 19/20 barged in against me. The lady with him reprimanded him but he just headed in a straight line to the DVDs which he was clearly focussed on.
She apologised and said she was so sorry but he was autistic and had no spatial awareness. I said it was OK, no harm done and I had worked with people with LD and autism but it did make me think of this thread.
Makes me think that people are too quick to excuse .
People with autism can have good manners the same as anyone else .
Really
Would you care to elaborate Muddy?
The “can” is the operative word.
Social distancing may have been a factor in Auriol’s behaviour. At the time people were walking out into the street to avoid people on pavements. Some people still defiantly walk in the middle of the road now glaring at any car.
People with autism have very good manners but when frustrated can find it much harder to contain their emotions. I worked with a lovely chap who was autistic spectrum. He was very engaging and polite. But twice in the time we worked together there was a terrific scream from him when some piece of work that frustrated him could not be contained. Luckily it was directed at his computer screen, possibly an email. But I had never experienced anything like this before. We all sat there quietly acting as if nothing had happened. I liked him very much but I do think he was discriminated because of his condition. He was definitely overlooked for a job. Unfortunately our world discriminates against disabilities and anyone “different” and this creates a feedback loop which reduces tolerance to stress of less robust individuals. They are then judged on their behaviour which further reinforces feelings of inferiority and rejection.
Beautifully explained Annie.
I have two grandchildren who in on the spectrum .
Yes they do get upset and frustrated at times no they don’t have bad manners or at least if they do they get told off the same as anyone else .
Their parents are aware of their condition and make allowances they have unending patience for some out bursts but bad manners is a no no .
These children have to make their way in the world and despite everything they have to learn to conform in some degree to social mores .
Sometimes people with autism have to train themselves in social skills and good manners
I had a young friend at work who was autistic. Very intelligent but he didn’t naturally understand social interactions
For example you could be talking to him and if it was time for him to go home, he’d just get up and walk out. No goodbyes, no “I’m off now”, no “good night” just up and gone
He didn’t know that was unusual until someone commented and after that he “trained” himself to say good morning and good night
I don’t think there’s anything to suggest this woman was autistic, though?
The folks who give me hard stares, are just bonkers, they are self righteous, no personality defects.
You will be aware then that the “spectrum” is huge and can range from people mildly affected who find social interaction and eye contact really difficult to people who are unable to live alone and are completely in their own world.
My friend’s adult son has to have live in carers in his home because he could not cope alone but could fix any computer given to him and has impeccable manners if you are interested in computers and are willing to talk about them 24/7 but if you are not then he will say “please leave my house now.”
I am assuming your grandchildren are still quite young which is the easier stage and people are more accepting of children but as they grow up and become more socially isolated other issues can develop. People who don’t understand autism or indeed learning difficulties fullstop can be very hurtful and dismissive towards them.