Sorry in advance for a long post, but I just want to explain fully.
As some of you know, I joined a writing group at the start of the year. Just five of us, V&J, (a couple), M, and H. Initially, we went to fortnightly meetings at the grandparents’ house of V, who incidentally also lives there. (young female). Then a fair while ago, we were told her grandfather had Covid, so meetings would be held at M’s house. As this is further away, and in a road half surrounded by fields, I attended all meetings by zoom.
As each meeting came around, M just told us that ‘due to circumstances, we would continue to have meetings at my house’, and he even spoke to me, last time in V’s absence, through the computer, that they were trying to find an alternative venue, blah blah, but still nothing was explained why.
I think a fortnight ago, when J also had Covid, V said in an email she had no work to submit, and wouldn’t attend, as she ‘wasn’t of the right mindset’. I just took this to mean she was concerned about J. Only H went to M’s house, and with myself on zoom there were just 3 of us.
Last night, the four of them were at M’s house, me still on zoom, and innocently I asked V if she had emailed any work for us to discuss, maybe at the last minute. She replied ‘no, it was my grandfather’s funeral yesterday’.
I was so surprised at this, said I am so sorry, I didn’t know. ‘No, we didn’t advertise it’, she replied. ‘We felt it wouldn’t be appropriate to continue to have meetings at their house’.
But of course, neither M nor H were surprised at this news, so seemingly they already knew. So how come I didn’t, and had to find out this way? I already have FOMO when all are at M’s house and I am on the other end of a computer, as they sit laughing and chatting, and I don’t hear a lot of what is being said. But I couldn’t help feeling a little hurt that nobody thought to explain to me that V had sadly lost her grandfather, hence all meetings being shifted elsewhere.
M seems to co-ordinate everything, so it stands to reason he would know, but then, so obviously did H. I may be new to the group but wonder why they felt this need to exclude me from such information, when in actual fact it does concern me in a way, due to the shake up of venue, and me having to attend by zoom each time. (True, by choice, but it would add about an hour to a sometimes long evening (from 7, to beyond 9pm)
Of course it would be insensitive or churlish of me to bring it up with V, or M. But am I right to feel a bit left out? (Sorry, it’s a bit hard to put into writing what I am trying to say.)
Thoughts, please. (Thanks for listening, or reading…)
as I have got older I have learnt not to let the action of others (or lack of them) bother me, life is too short.